deepundergroundpoetry.com
Surveillance
My radar pinged
distant pit bulls bickered
and a crow cleared its throat
but it was only the old man
watering can in hand
white beard and pajamas
whispering love to his plants
I saw her hurry
the girl he left you for
looking slimmer than you
with longer hair and paler skin
finer features too
I felt your door close
gently across the hall
before he double locked
three turns of the key
to be sure to be sure
One can't be two careful
around daybreak
when night time spirits
tiptoe home so late
Published 7th Jul 2010
| Edited 28th Mar 2016
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 1
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comments 4
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
9th Jul 2010 3:06am
;) i have seen your work elsewhere and i enjoy from the comfort of the corner.
Anonymous
10th Jul 2010 4:51am
<< post removed >>
10th Jul 2010 9:55am
Abra...I m reading you after a long time, but I have never forgot your style...I remember your sense of humor and observational characteristics in your previous works, and I admire you a lot...You even commented on a previous works to a gr8 deal...
As to this poem, a wonderful piece with the strongest opening and thrillest ending.
As to this poem, a wonderful piece with the strongest opening and thrillest ending.
10th Jul 2010 9:58am
The old man whispering love to his plants and the starting line of the last stanza..."One can't be two careful..." is worth reading. I enjoyed a lot.
