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Out of Reach
Time is ticking away
it's just dripping away
the day's slipping away
and we've got to choose
go
or stay
The time
our time
is flying out the
forever open
window
Alighting out of reach
irretrievable
in a place we've dubbed the past
a place
we should attempt to hinder
in it's soul past-time
of sucking seconds from our
so far undecided
future
We as a people
need to seize the present
if we want to recruit the past
and make the most
of every waking minute
Patience may be a virtue
but in the end
waiting for what you want
will only serve to hurt you.
it's just dripping away
the day's slipping away
and we've got to choose
go
or stay
The time
our time
is flying out the
forever open
window
Alighting out of reach
irretrievable
in a place we've dubbed the past
a place
we should attempt to hinder
in it's soul past-time
of sucking seconds from our
so far undecided
future
We as a people
need to seize the present
if we want to recruit the past
and make the most
of every waking minute
Patience may be a virtue
but in the end
waiting for what you want
will only serve to hurt you.
Written by
Duncan
(Duncan Alexander)
Published 30th Oct 2012
| Edited 1st Nov 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 9
reading list entries 1
comments 15
reads 935
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re: Out of Reach
Anonymous
30th Oct 2012 8:15am
A great poem by your pen, I really like the reflective images, I love the stanza....
We as people
Need to seize the present
If we want to recruit the past
And make the most
Of every waking minute
True so true!
LuMe¤
We as people
Need to seize the present
If we want to recruit the past
And make the most
Of every waking minute
True so true!
LuMe¤
1
re: Re: Out of Reach
1st Nov 2012 00:27am
It always comes down to your decision to keep on living. While you're living you owe it to yourself to make the most of what you've given yourself.
Thanks, I'm glad you liked it.
Thanks, I'm glad you liked it.
Re: Out of Reach
30th Oct 2012 8:22am
re: Re: Out of Reach
1st Nov 2012 00:29am
re: re: Re: Out of Reach
1st Nov 2012 3:33pm
yes. Bliss in ign0rance. Sorrow in kn0wing but 0nce in a while these theories mix. . . and we find ourselves in uncharted fields
1
Re: Out of Reach
Anonymous
- Edited 30th Oct 2012 9:02am
30th Oct 2012 9:01am
None of the commas are necessary and only hinder the rhythm, but otherwise this is a nicely succinct poem which is a pleasant and thought-provoking experience. Thanks for the read.
1
re: Re: Out of Reach
1st Nov 2012 00:31am
Thanks Jack, I see that now, duly edited. I always feel the need to make sure the reader can find the cadences I have in mind for my pieces while reading them, oft' times overly so.
Always a pleasure.
Always a pleasure.
Re: Out of Reach
30th Oct 2012 4:16pm
In this, you tell nothing but the truth - and still tell it in such a way as to make it seem like a secretive thing. Love the word play, the easy flow, the "feeling" of it. Good write Duncan!
1
re: Re: Out of Reach
Thank you. I put alot of weight into the feel of my poems and that you liked this one's feeling means alot.
Re: Out of Reach
30th Oct 2012 8:18pm
re: Re: Out of Reach
Re: Out of Reach
31st Oct 2012 4:43am
re: Re: Out of Reach
1st Nov 2012 00:35am
Haha, if you did that time would be poured away rather than dripped. I'm glad you appreciated it.
Re: Out of Reach
13th Nov 2012 2:31pm
re: Re: Out of Reach
13th Nov 2012 8:33pm