deepundergroundpoetry.com
Tender Blossom
Delicate, demur, subdued, beauty
Oh, how you rise in me the softest of desires
Fragile and captivating
You sway and flutter to gentle, rhythmic notes
Dancing before me,
Yet miles away from my reality
You are the epitome of feminine
Alluring and majestic
In a very coy and tranquil way
Filling me with a burning fascination
Yearning to graze my fingers across your silken skin
Though touching you would be a sin
Your name alone means "Artist"
And you are finer than any lovely painting
Free from blemish and defilement
Painted as white as innocence
Yet with lips as red as my desire
You mesmerize me
You're part of a world that is swiftly fading
A culture on its deathbed
Brought to its knees by evolution of society
Subtlety is an extinct breed
Though your muted ease seduces me
they don't know what they're missing
Tender Blossom, more graceful then falling flowers
Caught in a lackadaisical breeze
My heart will not be complete without you
With your shimmering charm and alluring mystique
Honor me by taking me as your Danna
And I shall take you as my Geisha
Oh, how you rise in me the softest of desires
Fragile and captivating
You sway and flutter to gentle, rhythmic notes
Dancing before me,
Yet miles away from my reality
You are the epitome of feminine
Alluring and majestic
In a very coy and tranquil way
Filling me with a burning fascination
Yearning to graze my fingers across your silken skin
Though touching you would be a sin
Your name alone means "Artist"
And you are finer than any lovely painting
Free from blemish and defilement
Painted as white as innocence
Yet with lips as red as my desire
You mesmerize me
You're part of a world that is swiftly fading
A culture on its deathbed
Brought to its knees by evolution of society
Subtlety is an extinct breed
Though your muted ease seduces me
they don't know what they're missing
Tender Blossom, more graceful then falling flowers
Caught in a lackadaisical breeze
My heart will not be complete without you
With your shimmering charm and alluring mystique
Honor me by taking me as your Danna
And I shall take you as my Geisha
Published 14th Oct 2012
| Edited 15th Oct 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 17
reading list entries 5
comments 34
reads 1549
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
14th Oct 2012 8:03am
"Your part of a world that is swiftly fading "
Your should be You're
Other than that, it is beautiful. :)
Your should be You're
Other than that, it is beautiful. :)
14th Oct 2012 8:04am
Anonymous
14th Oct 2012 9:34am
Far too concise for such a complex piece than a mere "beautiful" or a proof read. This is far more sensual and sexual than your other poems and is very refreshing, I enjoyed reading this as your diction skills and your passion seem to carry the piece through to it's end. But yes, it is beautiful, and it leaves me too ponder in your own desires.
I'd like to see more of this style from you AlwaysCaliban, as it suits you so very well. Beautifully done, i'd be honoured to have this in my reading list.
I'd like to see more of this style from you AlwaysCaliban, as it suits you so very well. Beautifully done, i'd be honoured to have this in my reading list.
Your comments are ever gracious! Thank you so much for enjoying this piece, it is a passion of mine, and has been for quite awhile. Suiting of an longing/erotic read. I like refreshing, glad to hear that I'm not getting stagnant, haha!
As for my own desires...;)
As for my own desires...;)
Anonymous
14th Oct 2012 9:45am
You're more than welcome, and yes I wonder if there is any sexual frustration being vented through here, it adds to the poem's beauty.
Ah, Vegan, you know me quite well, my poems are transparent to you.
Haha, used your expression there without even realizing it.
Haha, used your expression there without even realizing it.
Anonymous
14th Oct 2012 9:51am
Ah.. great minds think alike, no? ;)
14th Oct 2012 7:10pm
14th Oct 2012 7:36pm
14th Oct 2012 11:58pm
Whoa! Are you AlwaysCaliban? Do I know you? Wow, really good. I didn't expect one of these from you but it's amazing.
15th Oct 2012 00:03am
Haha, thank you Levi! You just made me laugh hardcore. Yeah, it's a change, huh? But I'll stick to my dark roots.
15th Oct 2012 00:08am
15th Oct 2012 00:12am
Valid point there. :) But I'm less worried about the absence of dark than I am about the potential of further sappiness! haha
I was very pleased with this poem, Caliban, and found it romantic, lovely, and beautiful in every way imaginable. "Subtlety is an extinct breed" you wrote... and oh how many times I myself have thought this very same thought when thinking back on the days when subtlety was yet another form of beauty, and when both subtlety and beauty were considered an art that borderlined on the sacred! Your poem enchanted and captivated me very much, my friend, and I would dearly love to see more such poems in this style from you in the future. Darkness and light go so well together, after all! :)
Thank you, I'm glad you adored it so much. After I wrote it I actually thought of you, haha.
Anonymous
26th Jan 2013 1:16am
Oh Kou... Jessica, do you prefer to be called?... I love the way you think! I never thought about the nature of subtlety quite like that before. Now I'll certainly give it more pondering! Why must beauty, glory, and subtlety be extinct breeds? I strive for such things, myself, so you are hardly alone in your feelings. Darkness and light do indeed go well together! Love and light to you, sister.
15th Oct 2012 6:32am
I thought this was very beautiful. I think you should, as some have mentioned, continue to grow off of this. It is a very complex subject matter, with a lot of unique opportunities. There is also a very dark side to the subject, as Geisha were prized as objects, settling into the standard perception of women in Japan. Of course that could be very disruptive to the message of the piece. A little perversion or idolization wouldn't be too bad.
Either way, I think it should continue to be worked on. Sin is a western concept mostly, though it was known that there were missionaries from Europe before Japan closed its borders. Other then that just try to really refine the ideas. The first couple stanzas are beautiful, though I feel like the piece gets into the really interesting details of the Geisha's life near the end of the poem, where I feel it should encompass at least half. Like I said these are just comments and I am likely rambling by this point. I do think this is beautiful. I will love to see what you continue to do with it.
Either way, I think it should continue to be worked on. Sin is a western concept mostly, though it was known that there were missionaries from Europe before Japan closed its borders. Other then that just try to really refine the ideas. The first couple stanzas are beautiful, though I feel like the piece gets into the really interesting details of the Geisha's life near the end of the poem, where I feel it should encompass at least half. Like I said these are just comments and I am likely rambling by this point. I do think this is beautiful. I will love to see what you continue to do with it.
Thank you. Your comments are valid, and if I choose to do a piece on Geishas I will take them into consideration. This is merely a poem of longing. :)
AlwaysCaliban
AlwaysCaliban
15th Oct 2012 10:37pm
15th Oct 2012 10:38pm
15th Oct 2012 11:20pm
15th Oct 2012 11:22pm
16th Oct 2012 8:49am
"Tender Blossom, more graceful then falling flowers
Caught in a lackadaisical breeze
My heart will not be complete without you
With your shimmering charm and alluring mystique"
I love that stanza!
This was written beautifully, A! Stunningly Sensual.........just like it's author! :-)
Caught in a lackadaisical breeze
My heart will not be complete without you
With your shimmering charm and alluring mystique"
I love that stanza!
This was written beautifully, A! Stunningly Sensual.........just like it's author! :-)
16th Oct 2012 8:51am
Ooh, thank you ;) xoxo. Glad you enjoyed it, it is quite senual compared to my other writes. Your comments are always a pleasure to read.
17th Oct 2012 1:36am
25th Oct 2012 2:21pm
I can taste your Geisha on my tongue. This is a very tranquil poem and the desire is thick. Awesome expression.
28th Oct 2012 9:38pm
29th Oct 2012 7:44pm
I believe this all waftingly captures the Geisha's essential fragrance of the subtle glancing look in the bottle of your perfumed poem.
Tender Blossom, more graceful then falling flowers
Caught in a lackadaisical breeze
Tender Blossom, more graceful then falling flowers
Caught in a lackadaisical breeze
This is the third of your poems I've read. I'm holding back -- it's like hallowed ground. I have to get all settled so I'm ready to focus. I also want to enjoy the anticipation.
Nothing sappy about a geisha -- she is armed with invisible razor blades to make you bleed internally. I think you captured that quite nicely. The geisha is like a vampire that would not feed on the tainted blood of those who cannot appreciate her subtlety. I think you let your guard down to her just fine.
Nothing sappy about a geisha -- she is armed with invisible razor blades to make you bleed internally. I think you captured that quite nicely. The geisha is like a vampire that would not feed on the tainted blood of those who cannot appreciate her subtlety. I think you let your guard down to her just fine.
10th Nov 2012 3:54am
I must say, you have a gift for flattery. Each one of your comments have made me smile, how I smile when I read your "Frame Lake" poems. Thank you so much for your kind words.
16th Dec 2012 3:06am
Anonymous
26th Jan 2013 1:14am
I love this poem of yours, Caliban, you have a great deal of talent and such romanticism to describe the beauty of a fading tradition. I want to cry when I think how much this world has lost and is losing of beauty every day... but poems like this show me that some still remember and honor the beauty. And then I'm not sad anymore!
Anonymous
9th Feb 2013 10:00am
I still like this poem! I've read it before, but when I go back and read it again it still moves my heart. That's good, powerful writing! Thanks for this vision of beauty, Cali! You rule, girl.
