Doing as I did,( a phone texted bit of doggerel)

As I suck on my pickle,
it's your clit that I tickle,
and the smoke that I breathe,
you cumming on me,
it's always been that way,
from the very first day,
and the only way I'd quit,
is daily, on my face you'd sit.

So as you work, or are squatting to pee,
and in doing so, thinking of me,
sucking on pickles big as you please,
taking it in with a practiced ease,
it's all only for you,
that I do as I do.

Even as I sit,
thinking the more of it,
while upon my throne,
and ruling all alone,
that as I loosen my bowels,
into it's porcelain jowls,
it's all only for you,
that I poo as I do.

I can save it all up,
and serve in cups,
for your men as they eat,
a real killer treat.
What? I'm only trying to get along,
with this growing horny throng,
and those that don't sicken and die,
may have a slice of my pie.
See I'm being quite nice,
just ridding you of Lice.

I only hasten the day,
they'll travel along Heaven's way.
Only doing them a favor
by sending them to their savior,
and so saving them from sin,
lest they do it again.
Keeping them from despoiling
the love for which I've been toiling,
denying their seed,
from where I would feed.
Freed from those jerks,
I'm so happy in my work,
waiting to be showered,
never fearing like a coward,
that in the end I'd be drowned,
smothered by the love that I'd found.

But you that know me best,
surely knowing I only jest,
it was you who brought up that pickle,
and my boyish fancies did you tickle,
you set my mind on the trail,
of your cute and bounteous tail.

So hush all your wailing,
and cries that I'm failing,
to be as you think,
just some nice little twink,
happily spending his days,
watching you and your lovers at play.

Would’ve that I could’ve,
done you, as I should’ve,
still, I'd move heaven and earth
for only your mirth,
it's all only for you,
that I did as you bid.