The Science of Affection

I was watching TV, and I thought how strange and beautiful it is when lovers kiss… Grabbing at each other, trying desperately to find a connection, an end to this vast space of human loneliness. To meld lives and bodies... I have been alone for so long now, and unfortunately I don't think love was ever in the cards for me, and shall not be within the odd, melancholic, suffering-kissed blink of my lifetime… But today, I imagined being kissed once again and embraced by someone I loved… To be able to fill that perpetual emptiness inside me… How perhaps only the taste of me on his lips would give me form and dimension, make me feel worthy of being seen and heard… And as I imagined our tongues melting together, I suddenly remembered how, on an atomic level, nothing can ever really touch, because our electrons naturally repel each other–and this made me sad and only reinforced my innate sense of estrangement from the human race. But, on a more positive note perhaps, I have a tiny crush on someone again, and it's nice, to feel that soft flurry and gentle fever for another human being deep in the pit of my stomach, even though I can never, ever tell him how I feel, for such a thing would be epically disastrous. I have only to comfort myself with the fact that, above all else, I FEEL, and feel so very much–and, only in this, am I, perhaps, not so completely, irrevocably alone.