The League of Horrible Pants

They were a triad of unfortunate fashion
wide, wide pants
with wide, wide openings
two pairs exhausted black
one the grayish brown of smog

the frayed bottoms swept up dust
and crumbs
and who knows what else
as they walked (three wide of course)
 the aisles of the local Safeway

One's tattered jacket
as unfortunate looking as his pants
had an evil clown on the back
with some sort of I-warned-you message about madness
maybe he was a CPA who coaches Little League
one never knows
life is random and weird

What message did they want to spread
to their fellow Safeways shoppers?

I regret not looking in their handheld basket
I'm picturing cheap hot dogs, Red Bull, and lasagna noodles (the widest member of the pasta family, of course)
maybe artichoke hearts and lemon curd
since life is random and weird

Perhaps we all dress,
in one way or another, 
to show what we are capable of
or what we care 
or don't care about

The sartorially tragic triad
The League of Horrible Pants,
had a message
or maybe 
they simply enjoy wearing 
a wide, wide variety
of wide, wide, horrible pants