Don't slice until you know for sure

Distraught over the belief that his wife was having an affair, Poppa Woody of Canada cut off his own penis & testicles with a kitchen knife in 2006. Unfortunately for him, he lived. Mrs. Woody denied ever having an affair. Since Mr. Woody's sex life hasn't been the same, Mrs. Woody currently seeks men to fulfill her sexual wants and desires. Mr. Woody understands and excepts his wife's lifestyle!