I wish I knew How

I wish I could fix you
But im  just so confused
people aren’t supposed to break and
You didn’t come with insurance or a warranty or even a manual.
I couldn’t even find directions, not even the ones
Written in tiny scrawl and printed in a thousand different languages
Folded up a million times so they never go back the right way
You’re like that
because all the jigsaw puzzle pieces that make  you, you don’t Ever fit just right,  
So im clueless as to what to do with you
You should’ve come with a  little note that said “some assembly required”
Or rather a lot of assembly in your case, you should be recalled
You’re defective
You’re …not even broken, because if you were just broken and shattered I could have made you
Into  something valuable,
I could have Recycled you like they do with bottles and cans and things that were once useful ,
Or  I could have donated  you
Like they do with old sweaters and mismatched spoon sets
I could have set  you on the curb for a charity to collect
If you were made of anything worth keeping,
I could have folded your broken pieces
into origami cranes or woven them together and strung them on wire, transforming them
into a necklace or something a thousand times more beautiful than
a neurotic Boy with lovely eyes and an always broken heart.
I’m not saying you are all bad, No one is,
I hear serial killers love their mothers and
Cannnibals won’t eat their own.
So there must be a nightlight in the pitch black horror land that is your psyche
There must be one good spot,  that I don’t ever get to see.
Actually I could forgive myself for thinking you were so amazing
A sweet face is so deceptive,
Eyes so young and a face so innocent
Can’t do anything but hide something awful
If the world were a coloring book,
God would’ve colored you perfectly in between the lines,
In shades of sunsets and rainbows and lovely colors
like bright crimson and the maroon of freshly spilt blood
Brilliant colors
Can hide darkness so deep, every other emotion can’t help but be shallow
Maybe one day when you say I love you,
And I say I love you too, we won’t both be lying
Maybe that’s someday soon, but it’s definitely not today.