Trophy

 
If I look the other way you're unhappy
my pain is your pleasure, to you
not seeing your nature, I touch the heavens
isn't your game fun enough for you, while I'm sleeping?

going through life with a grateful song...I am happy
you awarded me second place in your heart
so I chose substances

because it was a cruel bed you made for me
my affections went ignored year in and out
cruelly you always let me know
when someone else was amusing

it wasn't enough to cheat
your game wasn't fun enough if I wasn't in deep
watching from far off I know

I gave you my heart for you to break it
and I know I will pay for the years I abused it

ignoring the scarring
disconnected and hurting
my tears leak from my shattered being
unknown  to my soul whom I have locked away
to keep me safe

lust is love in your eyes
may you illicit what you desire
it's what your ego needs
I will not seek the affection of another while my heart is aching
darkness only seeks to wet it's beak

taking another piece of me, a trophy