Let Me Vent

First off I want to blame my parents
I didn’t ask to be born
All this weight I carry
Feeling selfish with my ways
I’m feeling angry
Momma had me young
She was just a baby
Sometimes I wish she never made me
Never laid down with my father
I wish she would have waited
Look at the mess they created
Now I’m feeling hated
I watch my life pass me by
All the time I wasted
I should have been searching for answers
Like why my daddy leave me
Why was he incarcerated?
Why couldn’t momma feed me
Working 2 jobs just wasn’t enough
All I ever wanted was my daddy’s love
He taught me to be strong
Always be tough
And never go looking for love in a man
I finally understand
I seen it firsthand
I’m a product of a one night stand
It’s no surprise I wasn’t planned

Momma I’m sorry
Dad I miss you
What was the issue
I sat for hours by the door
Just waiting on you
But you never came and I admit
It affected me as a kid
So much I took a blade to my skin
Even deep within it wasn’t enough
A product of my dad’s lust
I no longer have trust
For no man who claims to love me
Cause the first man put everything above me
I’m just a victim of a love that wasn’t healthy


Second off I want to blame myself
I could have asked for help
But my pride had me trapped in hell
I had these deep deep thoughts
I was gonna be killed
All alone I hid my fear
Just to be clear
I put so many women above me
And although it got ugly
I put my trust in anyone who said they loved me
I was young when I started having sex
I didn’t care about the gender
As long as they weren’t like the rest
As I got older
My heart got colder
I was a mess
I couldn’t express
All the pain inside my chest
Now I’m blessed with a second chance
I will never let a woman put her hands on me ever again
I see the light at the end of the tunnel
Getting so close to my dreams
I just hope I don’t crumble
If I should die before I wake
I pray the lord my soul to take
Free me from my demons
Free me from this plague