My dysfunction...

My poor head is pounding, and my mouth is so dry.
My eyes are so puffy but its because i got high.
My mind is all rattled, ive killed cells in my brain..
Everyone has a way of dealing with pain.
Ive got wounds on the inside that ive heard time will mend..,
Living life in the fast lane, until i hit a dead end...
Im so easily angered and I so seldom smile,
I talk way too much but i say nothing worthwhile.
I went from a daughter and sister,
to a mother and wife...
And yet still I feel worthless,
like i have wasted my life.
Ive been convicted of felonies, ..
less then 5 more then one..
Im not really a criminal but i have lived life on the run.
Each year on my birthday, I turn 25...
Cuz the older i get, the less i feel alive.
My moms now an invalid, but she did give me birth.
But my dad was the greatest , for whatever it worth....
My son is amazing but he grew up too fast..
My sweet little boy now a child long done past.
So often i fall into a pit of despair,
where depression consumes me and im fighting for air.
And im searching for something, crying out in the night.
Lookin for answers to make everything right.
But my poor head is pounding and my mouth is so dry..
My eyes are still puffy because i got high...
My mind is still racing , ive fried most of my brain...
But I don't even know it cuz im numb from the pain.