deepundergroundpoetry.com
Hey Dad.
Hey Dad
I‘m getting five today
And I know that you gonna be there
And I know we‘ll have some fun today
So see you soon when you get here
I love you
Hey Dad
My 10th birthday was cool
Was different with you not being there
I hope we can celebrate soon
We still got some cake to share
I got new toys!
Can we play with them?
I know we‘ll have fun
Tell me, when will you come again?
In how many months?
I miss you
Hey Dad!
Where’s your fucking face?
You send a present, huh?
And you send a letter, thanks.
Your presence would be better though
Remember my sister?
She’s your daughter too
Did you know that she has cancer?
Doesn’t seem like it’s touching you.
For you just having left her.
Fifteen years you left me alone
I don’t know what a father can mean
And still you wonder why I blocked your phone
And we don’t properly speak.
My anger is suffocating my health
I don’t think we should talk any longer
Greetings to your family from your girls
Unluckily we‘re still your daughters.
Hey Dad.
I‘m 17 now.
I have new friends.
I figure how life goes.
I make new plans.
I‘d say I hate you
But how do you hate a shadow?
A shallow memory, in my mind
Data nowhere to be found.
You said we‘ll reconcile.
I couldn’t believe you.
You’re stubborn in your head
I cry when I’m near you.
You send a letter, thanks.
Your words were empty.
Thank you for the cash.
At least its purpose I can choose freely.
It’s been a while since we spoke.
Your words still cut deep.
Not just because they hurt
But how ignorant they seem.
I want to be mad you left us
But I don’t think you’d understand.
You’re coming twice a year to her grave
But when she died never held her hand.
Dear father,
Why forgive you?
Why should I take more pain for your time?
Dear father,
I don’t miss you.
At least right now I’m feeling fine.
Maybe in the future.
Maybe there’ll be a day.
When my anger comes to standstill.
And love sometimes will ease the pain.
But until that you remain a stranger.
Sincerely
Yours Kira.
I‘m getting five today
And I know that you gonna be there
And I know we‘ll have some fun today
So see you soon when you get here
I love you
Hey Dad
My 10th birthday was cool
Was different with you not being there
I hope we can celebrate soon
We still got some cake to share
I got new toys!
Can we play with them?
I know we‘ll have fun
Tell me, when will you come again?
In how many months?
I miss you
Hey Dad!
Where’s your fucking face?
You send a present, huh?
And you send a letter, thanks.
Your presence would be better though
Remember my sister?
She’s your daughter too
Did you know that she has cancer?
Doesn’t seem like it’s touching you.
For you just having left her.
Fifteen years you left me alone
I don’t know what a father can mean
And still you wonder why I blocked your phone
And we don’t properly speak.
My anger is suffocating my health
I don’t think we should talk any longer
Greetings to your family from your girls
Unluckily we‘re still your daughters.
Hey Dad.
I‘m 17 now.
I have new friends.
I figure how life goes.
I make new plans.
I‘d say I hate you
But how do you hate a shadow?
A shallow memory, in my mind
Data nowhere to be found.
You said we‘ll reconcile.
I couldn’t believe you.
You’re stubborn in your head
I cry when I’m near you.
You send a letter, thanks.
Your words were empty.
Thank you for the cash.
At least its purpose I can choose freely.
It’s been a while since we spoke.
Your words still cut deep.
Not just because they hurt
But how ignorant they seem.
I want to be mad you left us
But I don’t think you’d understand.
You’re coming twice a year to her grave
But when she died never held her hand.
Dear father,
Why forgive you?
Why should I take more pain for your time?
Dear father,
I don’t miss you.
At least right now I’m feeling fine.
Maybe in the future.
Maybe there’ll be a day.
When my anger comes to standstill.
And love sometimes will ease the pain.
But until that you remain a stranger.
Sincerely
Yours Kira.
Published 18th Mar 2023
Author's Note
Felt inspired by a Brandon Leak performance I saw. Nowadays it seems to be more of a surprise if your parents are still together than if they‘re separated. My whole life I’ve known nothing different than seeing my das only once a month or so. It’s sad to see how many parents turn their backs on their children, how much hurt they cause the only persons that are willing to love them unconditionally. It’s something I really can’t understand.
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The author encourages honest critique.
18th Mar 2023 1:25pm
you know how i feel about this, and what i‘d do to take the hurt away from you. what i‘d do to make it stop. i don’t get it completely, of course, but i feel it enough to stay right by your side and support you in feeling what you feel. i am always here for you, no matter what. your problems become my problems, and i am so happy to go through everything with you :)
4th Sep 2023 9:39pm
OMG! this is heartbreaking and well captured.
A painfully beautiful love/hate poem
Makes me wonder about the father and how much loss, pain and abandonment he must have experienced to pass it on to his children.
A painfully beautiful love/hate poem
Makes me wonder about the father and how much loss, pain and abandonment he must have experienced to pass it on to his children.
