Not a fan

My wife dressed as a fair maiden.
I feel a fool in this get up im laden.

Shes all smiles papi I like.
No one wants to see this monstrous sight

I'm in some weird barbarian clad.
Big fake sword across my back.

Shes dressed like a beautiful maid Marian.
I'm suppose to be Conan another barbarian.

She saying I get to show you off tonight
Why am I praying they loose light

She runs her hands across my abs and chest
Do it for me papi so I give 8t a rest

My daughters dressed up as Kitana Mileena
My son's as mobsters cutest I've seen a

I feel foolish gggggrrrr
I look like a Manege Kurr.

Now she want to coat my body in baby oil
I thought barbarians were covered in soil.

Shes just smiles say we make them jealous.
Why cause I have a bigger chest.

Get to the party no will speak.
Talking back and fourth am I a freak.

So I just stand don't know what to say.
Wife winks at me don't take it off later we'll play.