deepundergroundpoetry.com
Antagonized
if my life were a movie
everyone would be rooting for him
not you
he'd be the protagonist
the nice guy who finishes last
the human equivalent of herculon furniture
durability and comfort
unremarkable facade
or maybe a sensible sedan
good for sunny road trips
you'd be a motorcycle
thrilling and dangerous
shredding black wet streets
louder than thunder
puddles of lightning
zero visibility
the audience
wouldn't like you
but most of the women
would line up for a ride
everyone would be rooting for him
not you
he'd be the protagonist
the nice guy who finishes last
the human equivalent of herculon furniture
durability and comfort
unremarkable facade
or maybe a sensible sedan
good for sunny road trips
you'd be a motorcycle
thrilling and dangerous
shredding black wet streets
louder than thunder
puddles of lightning
zero visibility
the audience
wouldn't like you
but most of the women
would line up for a ride
Published 14th Oct 2022
| Edited 29th Dec 2022
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 6
reading list entries 2
comments 7
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
14th Oct 2022 9:11am
Dear PD,
I like your analogies and metaphors in this write. I think your ending is fantastic. I kind of felt as though I was watching a short movie. Your descriptions are terrific. H🌷
I like your analogies and metaphors in this write. I think your ending is fantastic. I kind of felt as though I was watching a short movie. Your descriptions are terrific. H🌷
15th Oct 2022 1:58am
14th Oct 2022 12:31pm
15th Oct 2022 2:00am
16th Oct 2022 6:00pm
Cool write! I guess there's no secret which one I'd root for...
Your analogies are precise. But don't let those sedan drivers fool you. They have a trunk on that car, where a body fits. Lol. Bikers are all out in the open, nothing to hide. Well, maybe!
This is good stuff !
Your analogies are precise. But don't let those sedan drivers fool you. They have a trunk on that car, where a body fits. Lol. Bikers are all out in the open, nothing to hide. Well, maybe!
This is good stuff !
16th Oct 2022 11:49pm
Thanks. Still needs some fine tuning: revving down the road? zooming? Hopefully it will come to me. Glad you liked it. That means a lot to me.
Hate it when Mr. Nice Guy has a dead body in the trunk, but maybe I'm just too picky.
Hate it when Mr. Nice Guy has a dead body in the trunk, but maybe I'm just too picky.
17th Oct 2022 2:59am
The dead body is tolerable, as long as they wrap it airtight and all.
But, it's when they only use you for an alibi. They're so heartless!
But, it's when they only use you for an alibi. They're so heartless!
