The Power of Red

he asks a lot of questions  
 
i like that  
 
kinky scenes require communication  
to plan  
to go deeper   
into his psyche  
and mine  
-there is no ours-  
there's juet darkness  
where the stars blaze  
and meteors  
dash across the velvet sky  
 
he asks a lot of questions  
 
to stop me  
from getting him into legal trouble  
some of the things he does to me  
would be criminal  
without consent  
 
I give my consent  
for good reasons  
he plays to hurt  
but not to injure  
when i say Red  
he stops  
every time  
without hesitation  
which means  
ultimately  
 
i'm in control  
 
even better  
he knows i like pushing myself  
so he almost always stops  
when i want to say red  
but won't  
it feels like magic  
it feels loving  
-but it's not-  
i'm just a play partner  
but he stops when i say Red  
 
he asks a lot of questions  
some for his sadistic thrills  
impossible choices   
one evil vs another  
anticipating my discomfort  
 
no matter the choice  
i'll push myself beyond  
what i thought possible  
i can always make him stop  
he stops when i say Red  
 
some questions gauge my boundaries  
my willingness to explore further  
a few  
even have the intention  
of ensuring  
a satisfying scene for me  
pleasure even  
-but not too much-  
 
i'm just a casual play partner  
but he stops when I say Red  
 
he knows i have a need  
for intense play  
pain obfuscates my demons  
darkness  
brings them into the light  
his sadism  
is honest  
it reveals his kindness  
 
sometimes it's just exciting  
 
his hands on me  
his voice  
the anticipation  
the nervousness  
the fear  
the antithesis of boredom  
intense pain  
a great catalyst to after care  
which is as satisfying  
as the play itself  
 
call after care one of my kinks  
or just consider the common sense  
being thanked sincerely  
for pushing my limits  
for enduring great discomfort   
for meeting his needs  
 
yes i wanted it too  
but it's really hard  
and truly painful  
and the main thrill IS doing it for him  
it's so worth it when nurtured  
having cuts and bruises lovingly treated  
i need that too  
 
-but that's not really his thing-  
 
he asks a lot of questions  
to stay within the realm of decency  
 
i answer honestly  
but refrain from honest questions  
asking if he loves me  
-even though we've known each other for years-  
would be like asking that  
of a Target cashier  
 
shocking  
absurd  
 
inappropriate  
crazy  
 
he asks lots of questions  
to ensure he does not violate me  
to ensure i don't turn on him  
get him in legal trouble  
 
i won't  
like i said  
he stops when i say red  
 
if  
i come to the realization  
that these sporty  
loveless   
romanceless  
brief visits  
 
cause me more emotional pain  
than physical  
 
if the twinkling stars  
reveal sharp edges  
diamonds cutting glass  
bleeding from my soul  
 
i'll stop  
when i say Red  
 
ultimately  
 
i'm in control