deepundergroundpoetry.com
Pallor
I'm rarely ill,
Yet people are struck
by the pallor of my skin,
so pale,
yet having spent
days on end
in the sun.
It's as if my blood
has been diverted
to the core of my body,
in a desperate attempt
to melt the ice
that has encompassed
my heart.
Yet people are struck
by the pallor of my skin,
so pale,
yet having spent
days on end
in the sun.
It's as if my blood
has been diverted
to the core of my body,
in a desperate attempt
to melt the ice
that has encompassed
my heart.
Published 21st Mar 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 1
reading list entries 0
comments 1
reads 685
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
21st Mar 2012 11:51pm
Well, not sweet, but depressing. Although you could of used paleness instead of pallor to explain your predicament. Using both pallor and pale so close together seems redundant to me at least...Other than that, pretty good. Just needs refinement.
