If I Must Dream

“If I Must Dream”

What happened to the moonlight on your face—
To that delicate and pallid gaze?
If there was one moment I might capture tonight
It would be to see you in that silver light
With the rays in your eyes, and the music in my tears—
To taste what has been missing and endears
Your memory in place of what truly had been,
That I fear shall be once again.

If I am dying, let me die remembering you like this.
Lying there in the half-light of the darkness.
Let me recall your voice for the music it used to be
And view deep in the eyes I no longer see
Eternity, sweet eternity.

And if I must live, how am I to live without that moon?
How am I to exist without such fortune
As to know your smile for just one moment more?
If I must live, how am I to endure
Another farewell when the night carries you hence,
With the tatters of my innocence?
Darling, how am I to survive if you give
Me one last hope, and reason to live?

If I must dream, what dream in ruin lies?
Was it the same that played behind my eyes
As I walked in fields of high grasses long ago
Pursuing the phantom of a naked shadow?
In that field, from some remote grave, I stole a flower
Tasting a breath that stilled, as much sweet as sour,
The wraithlike air of a twilight without end.
In silence, I waited for the night to descend
But the sun remained upon the tomb,
And I watched the wilted flower bloom,
Knowing not that it stood above the ruin,
And that it was I who lay within.

© 2022 Marten Hoyle