I Can't Fix This and I Have To Stop Trying

You can't fix glass no matter how much glue you got
I heard that once long ago
I guess it applies to families too
When I was younger I thought I could fix mine
That I'd try my best to hold us together
If I could be strong enough I could be the glue
Maybe replace those who held us as a family
But family isn't family if no one is trying
I was like someone tied to multiple horses
Each one running their own way
All of them carelessly ripping me apart
I wish that my family loved me even a little
This is one of the worst parts of my life
And I'm walking it without any of them
All of them so focused on their own story
That they've forgotten that they're main characters in mine
I wasted my youth chasing a family that never existed
My whole life lead by a simple thought
That I could save my family if I just tried hard enough
But I'm just fractured by it all
No one is here when I look around
No one who shares my dna anyway
I'm not trying to downplay the roles
That those who are here play in my life
But none of them are my blood
They're my chosen family and that's enough
But a part of my soul is dead and the rest of it fractured
Because my family really doesn't care about me
And I really have to stop pretending that they do