deepundergroundpoetry.com
Faceless
Lying here on
the sand again.
Dark all around
but I can hear the water
crashing down.
I'm no longer an ocean wave.
No more push or pull.
Trying hard to remember
everything I forgot.
But just like the moon
you're faceless now.
Never thought you'd fade.
So glad you stayed
away from me.
No longer a memory.
Your power dissolved so fast.
Like a shooting star
about to blast.
Trying hard to remember
everything I forgot
but just like the moon
you're faceless now.
Time to get off this
sand and take my
ass back home.
You see, I met someone new.
He's the opposite of you.
You're the moon,
he's the sun.
Love when my baby shines on me.
I know I won't get burned.
Love when my baby shines on me
Cause this time I finally learned.
Trying hard to remember
everything I forgot.
But just like the moon
your faceless now.
Love when my baby shines on me.
I know I won't get burned.
Love when my baby shines on me
Cause this time I finally learned.
the sand again.
Dark all around
but I can hear the water
crashing down.
I'm no longer an ocean wave.
No more push or pull.
Trying hard to remember
everything I forgot.
But just like the moon
you're faceless now.
Never thought you'd fade.
So glad you stayed
away from me.
No longer a memory.
Your power dissolved so fast.
Like a shooting star
about to blast.
Trying hard to remember
everything I forgot
but just like the moon
you're faceless now.
Time to get off this
sand and take my
ass back home.
You see, I met someone new.
He's the opposite of you.
You're the moon,
he's the sun.
Love when my baby shines on me.
I know I won't get burned.
Love when my baby shines on me
Cause this time I finally learned.
Trying hard to remember
everything I forgot.
But just like the moon
your faceless now.
Love when my baby shines on me.
I know I won't get burned.
Love when my baby shines on me
Cause this time I finally learned.
Published 5th Sep 2021
| Edited 8th Sep 2021
Author's Note
This is about closure and moving on.
Simple as that.
Simple as that.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 8
reading list entries 2
comments 23
reads 736
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
5th Sep 2021 10:19pm
5th Sep 2021 11:14pm
Thank you so much. Years back I wrote a screenplay called The Magic Guitar and thinking about adding lyrics to it and making it a musical. This is one of the songs.
I have a few more I am going to post but I need to modify and edit first.
Again thank you!!
I have a few more I am going to post but I need to modify and edit first.
Again thank you!!
5th Sep 2021 11:20pm
Yeah, I get ya. Make sure though that when you edit it, you still have something left. What I mean is, sometimes we can go overboard. Bjorn & Benny might be willing to collaborate with you on your project; after all, they know a thing or two about musicals; right? Are you planning to perform your musical at any stage or time in the future? Stage & time even, lol.
5th Sep 2021 11:42pm
God no!! LOL
I'm a writer. Not a performer. I got different screenplay project I'm currently working on. Gotta get it ready to submit to a few competitions next year. Trying to land that agent Everything now for me is free. Sucks but that's the way it goes being any kind of artist. Poetry is another outlet for me. My song lyrics are basically poems but with a bit more rhythm.
But in the meantime you never know who is going to knock on the door when it comes to song lyrics.
Fingers crossed right?
Thanks again amigo!!
I'm a writer. Not a performer. I got different screenplay project I'm currently working on. Gotta get it ready to submit to a few competitions next year. Trying to land that agent Everything now for me is free. Sucks but that's the way it goes being any kind of artist. Poetry is another outlet for me. My song lyrics are basically poems but with a bit more rhythm.
But in the meantime you never know who is going to knock on the door when it comes to song lyrics.
Fingers crossed right?
Thanks again amigo!!
6th Sep 2021 2:36am
You will have to put yourself out there, yes but I see you have talent, for sure.
10th Oct 2021 1:21am
Great song. I really liked this part:
"You see, I met someone new.
He's the opposite of you.
You're the moon,
he's the sun.
Love when my baby shines on me. "
You can sing that part in a tongue in cheek arrogant way also which could be fun alternative but if done in that context "I know I won't get burned + this time I finally learned " feels a bit defensive of course. Not saying it would be better just thought it was funny
"You see, I met someone new.
He's the opposite of you.
You're the moon,
he's the sun.
Love when my baby shines on me. "
You can sing that part in a tongue in cheek arrogant way also which could be fun alternative but if done in that context "I know I won't get burned + this time I finally learned " feels a bit defensive of course. Not saying it would be better just thought it was funny
10th Oct 2021 1:29am
Well hello again:)
Thank you!!
Sometimes us females keep falling for the same thing
until we finally learn. Experience is a great teacher. In all matters
of life.
It is funny! What would life be without a sense of humor.
Thanks for checking out my stuff.
Thank you!!
Sometimes us females keep falling for the same thing
until we finally learn. Experience is a great teacher. In all matters
of life.
It is funny! What would life be without a sense of humor.
Thanks for checking out my stuff.
4th Sep 2023 1:38am
Seems like such a long time ago I'm sure, when you posted this one. How true it played out, coincidently?
One of the pluses about posting online is that it maintains a time frame of our poetic journals. We can read back and see how we've moved forward with our writing and perhaps our realities too. Also, when other readers go through our (your) written history, it gives a pretty good description of what we are like personally. It leaks out of our writings.
You shine through your writes. It's impossible to keep it darkened when you are so brightly shining.
One of the pluses about posting online is that it maintains a time frame of our poetic journals. We can read back and see how we've moved forward with our writing and perhaps our realities too. Also, when other readers go through our (your) written history, it gives a pretty good description of what we are like personally. It leaks out of our writings.
You shine through your writes. It's impossible to keep it darkened when you are so brightly shining.
4th Sep 2023 2:07am
Look at you being so wonderful:)
How can I not love you with all of my heart!!!
This was one of the first songs I've written.
So so very long ago:)
Life and it's circles huh.
I'm so very happy at this new place I'm at with you.
I feel so very fortunate.
My love for writing has pushed me through a lot of places (good and bad) but it has also helped me with confidence and having self worth.
Everything else is just chocolate cake!!
And yes Mark - you are my chocolate cake:)
Thanks for the RL and taking a look at this oldie but goodie!
How can I not love you with all of my heart!!!
This was one of the first songs I've written.
So so very long ago:)
Life and it's circles huh.
I'm so very happy at this new place I'm at with you.
I feel so very fortunate.
My love for writing has pushed me through a lot of places (good and bad) but it has also helped me with confidence and having self worth.
Everything else is just chocolate cake!!
And yes Mark - you are my chocolate cake:)
Thanks for the RL and taking a look at this oldie but goodie!
4th Sep 2023 3:03am
Seems like a break up song here or an even better bounce back song. tight work lady
8th Sep 2023 1:51am
Hey Meme:)
It is a breakup song and a bounce back song.
It's like a two for one thing. haha
Thank you for the snaps on it.
Much appreciated!
It is a breakup song and a bounce back song.
It's like a two for one thing. haha
Thank you for the snaps on it.
Much appreciated!
4th Sep 2023 4:57am
Dear A,
“But just like the moon
your faceless now.” I love this! In an unrequited situation, for me, I thought I’d never get over and certainly never forget…until the moon finally shone- faceless. Great help in putting that feeling into words. Fab write! H🌷
“But just like the moon
your faceless now.” I love this! In an unrequited situation, for me, I thought I’d never get over and certainly never forget…until the moon finally shone- faceless. Great help in putting that feeling into words. Fab write! H🌷
8th Sep 2023 1:56am
Hi H!!
I put this on the site when I first got here. I've learned so much since then about line breaks and punctuation. LOL
The periods on this are killing me. They're an eyesore!! hahaha
Once you get to that point of closure in a relationship it's a calming feeling in a way. The power they had on you is gone. The back and forth wears you out to the point of exhaustion and you wonder why you even bothered. There are good people in this world. Gotta remember that.
Makes moving on easier - relying on good friends and realizing men aren't all bad.
Thanks for the RL lovely one:)
And you are fabulous - never forget that:)
I put this on the site when I first got here. I've learned so much since then about line breaks and punctuation. LOL
The periods on this are killing me. They're an eyesore!! hahaha
Once you get to that point of closure in a relationship it's a calming feeling in a way. The power they had on you is gone. The back and forth wears you out to the point of exhaustion and you wonder why you even bothered. There are good people in this world. Gotta remember that.
Makes moving on easier - relying on good friends and realizing men aren't all bad.
Thanks for the RL lovely one:)
And you are fabulous - never forget that:)
Anonymous
- Edited 29th Dec 2023 8:45pm
6th Sep 2023 4:17am
<< post removed >>
8th Sep 2023 2:02am
Hey Tim!!
So happy to see you back on DUP!!
Like I was telling Honoria - I posted this when I first got here - and the periods are irritating me. I'm not going to edit it though. It's a good reminder on how much I've learned on this site from all of the fantastic writers here - including you!!
Thank you so much for checking this out and your gracious comment!
I'm turning 49 this next year - I'm taking all the beautiful comments I can get!
later gator!!
So happy to see you back on DUP!!
Like I was telling Honoria - I posted this when I first got here - and the periods are irritating me. I'm not going to edit it though. It's a good reminder on how much I've learned on this site from all of the fantastic writers here - including you!!
Thank you so much for checking this out and your gracious comment!
I'm turning 49 this next year - I'm taking all the beautiful comments I can get!
later gator!!
8th Sep 2023 7:30pm
12th Sep 2023 2:14am
14th Sep 2023 8:33pm
I had a very bad time. Eye surgery, I was mad at the world. Canceled IRO here. Then it started to bother me again and I came up with news about a little star. It's a song about a blind girl who wants to become a little star in the constellation.
16th Sep 2023 7:40pm
I love how we get inspired. We find ways to self heal even if we don't realize it at the time. Being angry at the world can be exhausting. Good for you for writing!
18th Sep 2023 7:32pm
Today I'm giving a new "Pale Blue" And thank you for your kind support. I think I need people like that around me more often.
18th Sep 2023 7:52pm
I wanted to say that today the song "little star" also got the music, I struggled with it for a while, but I can clearly hear that Aurora sings it. :D
22nd Sep 2023 1:38am
22nd Sep 2023 3:54pm
Thank you for the mental support from such a beautiful new friend. It helps a lot. I put more lyrics in the "song lyrics" section, I hope you like them.
