deepundergroundpoetry.com
thanks, mate
watching an old bloke on the train struggling to open a packet of sandwiches and offering him a hand which he gratefully ate
Published 9th Jun 2021
| Edited 10th Jun 2021
Author's Note
just currently looking back at old poems and giving them a makeover- something I've not done before
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 5
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
10th Jun 2021 1:13am
The makeover job on this one must have worked a treat! It has the surreal humour of short poems by Stevie Smith and Ogden Nash.
10th Jun 2021 1:18am
15th Jun 2021 11:56pm
It's a clever piece that seems to rely on punctuation for meaning.
You offered the man a hand in opening the wrapping COMMA he was therefore grateful and ate in a thankful mood.
Or, he literally ate the hand gratefully.
You offered the man a hand in opening the wrapping COMMA he was therefore grateful and ate in a thankful mood.
Or, he literally ate the hand gratefully.
