If Only…

(for the Trade You My Soul comp)
 
A half-smoked cigarette in trembling fingers
the only point of light in the darkness
unseen by the man taking a long drag  
his mind far away from the smoke  
swirling into his lungs  
 
Time had left no mark here  
not a shadow or footprint remained
rain had long washed away  
that which he refused to remember
yet could not forget  
 
Ash and fire lingered in the air  
as he flicked the butt away
his fingers stained with nicotine  
shaking unseen in the darkness
This was where it all began  
 
The place where his son had dallied
with weak-minded men and demonic creatures
where he found his sons dead body  
drained of blood and carved with Satanic symbols
his blonde curls stained red, his eyes picked out by crows
 
Many a thing had changed in the ten years since
but the man's guilt hadn’t, it had only grown to haunt him
sinking to his knees, he retched, sobbed, clawed the dirt
as though his son was just beneath the surface
waiting for him to take his hand, and pull him back into this world of life
 
If he could, he would trade his soul for it