RECURRENT NOXIOUS FLOWERS OF DESPAIR  (9-1-1996, Galveston Island, Texas)

   
    
an atomic implosion    
abruptly    
bloomed forth    
in the dark    
pit    
of all my    
too long suppressed    
subconscious    
collective despair    
effectively turning me    
inside out    
completely abandoned    
alone and lost    
in the suddenly    
realized    
no longer hidden    
inner horrors    
of my own    
accumulatively inverted    
now exposed    
man made    
now seemingly manifest    
synaptically challenged    
pseudo insanity    
self perceived    
as now noted    
here    
in this briefly    
expressed    
distantly sensed    
inwardly reflective moment    
of newly arisen    
self recognition    
spontaneously spilled forth    
out onto this page
so loosely mined    
up from the    
previously unseen depths    
of the vague    
subtle    
shaky shadowland realm    
shallows    
of my restless    
subconscious minds    
most sensitive    
uncertain  unstable    
unknown    
though perhaps    
even darker    
peripherally lurking    
looming    
next suddenly relapsed    
attack    
or release    
of my no    
longer suppressed    
nor hidden    
innermost    
deepest doubts  
and fears  
to either explosively    
bloom forth again  
into yet another    
inner atomic implosion    
of full on    
deep despair    
or else    
who knows
perhaps  
at long last    
maybe even
completely disappear    
forevermore    
from my  long    
wearied journeys  
day to day    
still only mortal
present  temporal  
human life    
here