deepundergroundpoetry.com
Chasing A High
My hands shake, stomach aches, mind breaks, holding the gun thinking about all my mistakes. I’m coming undone, never said this rap would be fun, I’ve only just begun this shit might get me shunned. I’d give a fuck but I got none, fought my demons but they won, I can’t get outta this rut, I got a bad feeling in my gut, cut ties to the world, alone in my head with the door locked shut, crying on the bathroom floor, sick of this internal war, it’s a losing battle with the devil keeping score, dark thoughts getting harder to ignore, starting to wonder what the fuck I’m even fighting for? Does anyone even know anymore. Everyday feels like a chore. My mama told me to pray ask god to show me the way, I tried, confessed all my sins i swore I’d never say, made a promise to obey, that was yesterday and today is just as fucked up as every other day. If anyone asked I won’t lie and say I’m okay, why try to deny the depression I feel inside, l’m numb to cry, to scared to give up and die, I think my brain is fried, too many years chasing a high
Published 4th Dec 2020
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 5
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The author encourages honest critique.
4th Dec 2020 5:10am
Please hang in there.
There's help out there and you're not alone..
Please reach out if you need to. I know some people purge via their poems and I might be overreacting... but I just wanted to be cautious and remind you that there's help!!
You can pm me or way can find someone locally for you too...
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
please take care.
There's help out there and you're not alone..
Please reach out if you need to. I know some people purge via their poems and I might be overreacting... but I just wanted to be cautious and remind you that there's help!!
You can pm me or way can find someone locally for you too...
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
please take care.
Anonymous
5th Dec 2020 8:48pm
Your words are dripping with pain. Hopelessness. So fucking honest and raw. Personally my demons kick my ass every goddamn time. I hate it, I love it. Crying alone, dark thoughts, ignored by god - you express so many damaged emotions. This really touched a nerve with me. Raw honesty beats phony bullshit every time.
Very cool.
Very cool.
5th Dec 2020 8:58pm
I never write unless it's raw honesty and my truth, I never was able to talk about my feelings for some reason but writting is my release of it all, i totally relate with demons kicking my ass and how you hate it and love it. Thank you for reading and feel free to reach out if you ever need someone to listen. Stay well!
Anonymous
- Edited 27th Mar 2021 3:51pm
27th Mar 2021 1:53pm
Your Chasing a High and I'm Chasing you answering Why; I Come to These Two term's, in a Stake that in Which we Yearn's. I Felt the Tear, When u ask why I'm not here. But i came to Term with the Reality for which you Yearn.
Their is always someone out their who wishes the best for you. Who is seen the Pain you go through, and i held the capture of time. Wondering why you do the Personal Crime, of finding tear to tear. Of Now asking why i'm not here. To Hold you Close to the Pier in Which i Show the Sun; That Your the Only one, Who shall Find the Peace, in a Reality of Sunsets and Trees. So that U use me in time, rather then stack up burden of your Mind. The World is Cruel but in you I'm set to Full. The Hope intact, we set out for love and Respect. So that we find the peace unknown, in the Life we may be set to grown. Which just tells of time, in the hope of whole Rewind.
(Which will set) you: in peace, i get down on my knees. To Pray to G-d to hope he hears my tears, for You My Girl; the Woman of the World. Whom i Profess to know, but she is ever learning to grow, into another Term; When the World is in her yearn. And i Can't Keep up of now. But time will show, how she wishes her way, in another time i learn to pray; For her and me, so that we learn to see; the hope unknown. Till Life is shown.
Perhaps something good is c(a)me out of this, in me following. Either way someone's known: PEACE
Their is always someone out their who wishes the best for you. Who is seen the Pain you go through, and i held the capture of time. Wondering why you do the Personal Crime, of finding tear to tear. Of Now asking why i'm not here. To Hold you Close to the Pier in Which i Show the Sun; That Your the Only one, Who shall Find the Peace, in a Reality of Sunsets and Trees. So that U use me in time, rather then stack up burden of your Mind. The World is Cruel but in you I'm set to Full. The Hope intact, we set out for love and Respect. So that we find the peace unknown, in the Life we may be set to grown. Which just tells of time, in the hope of whole Rewind.
(Which will set) you: in peace, i get down on my knees. To Pray to G-d to hope he hears my tears, for You My Girl; the Woman of the World. Whom i Profess to know, but she is ever learning to grow, into another Term; When the World is in her yearn. And i Can't Keep up of now. But time will show, how she wishes her way, in another time i learn to pray; For her and me, so that we learn to see; the hope unknown. Till Life is shown.
Perhaps something good is c(a)me out of this, in me following. Either way someone's known: PEACE
Anonymous
- Edited 28th Mar 2021 7:39am
27th Mar 2021 8:56pm
I've Written a Poem Rap Poetry for you Which can be Found under the Link:
https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poems/414214-when-you-find-peace---lo-lo/
It contains a Link to an Instrumental Beat Which when Played can Enhance the Reader's Experience, Yet Either way speaks to the Full Extent of how I've felt in Regards to you. In Any Way, it is not to Creep you; But simply let you feel for which i've Written the Segment above inasmuch as the Rap Poem Poetry on Your behalf in Memorial. Consider it a Long Lost Thing Found under the Rubble of all Debris. It Extents to the Sum for Which is Felt And Hence not taken Lightly; but contrary to, Not Above Seriousness. Your An Inspiration Lo_bedda and As Such I Make My Tribute to you.
https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poems/414214-when-you-find-peace---lo-lo/
It contains a Link to an Instrumental Beat Which when Played can Enhance the Reader's Experience, Yet Either way speaks to the Full Extent of how I've felt in Regards to you. In Any Way, it is not to Creep you; But simply let you feel for which i've Written the Segment above inasmuch as the Rap Poem Poetry on Your behalf in Memorial. Consider it a Long Lost Thing Found under the Rubble of all Debris. It Extents to the Sum for Which is Felt And Hence not taken Lightly; but contrary to, Not Above Seriousness. Your An Inspiration Lo_bedda and As Such I Make My Tribute to you.
16th Apr 2021 9:36pm
9th Mar 2023 7:36pm
