Explososmosis..!

My thoughts are crazy    
And they've never been clearer  
I'm not even sure who I see in this mirror    
I wait and I watch    
For something familiar to appear    
I've never felt more uncomfortable    
With who I have become    
I paint myself    
In hope's to understand the artist    
An army of one    
In the light of the darkest    
These hands manipulated by a foreign mind    
I find that I still don't fully know myself    
I find I still have things to show myself    
Does anyone really know me    
I seem to be playing my own strange part    
In something I don't fully understand    
My temple being built    
With no prior plans    
Am I just another man    
A want.. I need to recognize my own face    
A fire to feed with no fuel to waste    
Less of my decisions are made with haste    
I wish some of my actions could be replaced    
Back to that look upon this face    
My eyes are darker    
These lines are harder    
My minds grows further into self departure    
Like a purification    
By reverse osmosis    
The fuse is lit in a room of explosives    
Just me by myself    
With a poet's psychosis    
   
                                                        ELI