Dear Leah..............The Pain/Grief, Relentless

 

The music is painful (all)....haven't listened
      since you left.
Should I force myself?   It's been over two
                                           years (since you're
                                          gone forever)......
I'm listening now. To whom is irrelevant
              I'm still missing the point of "it" that
                  once i was so intimate.

O, god....i wish i'd have spent more time with you
               during your last few years here on earth.

 You'd be amazed at the shit I've survived.
Hundreds of hospital days, wishing to go wherever
             you've gone, though it's not likely.

       Eternal Deep Anesthesia will have to do.
            And i'm so bloody  Tired/WEARY of
        20years "surviving"........& now, a virtual
             prisoner...a death sentence for Life.
                               House Arrest

You'd be amazed at the gallons of tears that have
 fallen in missing you, in grieving the loss of you.

How stupid of me to not be there with you when you
       were struggling in the results of the illness
             that you couldn't overcome.

    Alcoholism, Alcohol, Bloody Drunkeness, Intoxication.
                     Call it what you will.........poison!

        Pleas, forgive me, my dear child!

LOVE, Dada

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