alien encounter...

alien encounter...

last night, well in the early hours of this morning, i was abducted by aliens and taken to an unknown by me, a different part of the universe, a strange and fanciful place. they communicated with me by the means of telepathy (the ultimate experience of voices in the head!) i spoke out " if you're going to anally probe me, can i at least go to the loo first, i'm absolutely bursting for a pee!" they looked puzzled, and said nothing, but one of them led me to an alien toilet. i passed water, and a bit of wind! (something to tell my grandchildren that i farted in a ufo) but nothing else!. it was pretty much the same sortof toilet you'd find on Earth. what surprised me though, more than anything, was the massive supply of toilet rolls they had! i broached them on this subject, after first washing my hands for 21 seconds, whilst singing out loud "happy fucking birthday!" three times (i'm a quick singer!) and although these aliens each had two heads (sorry, forgot to mention that bit!) each head on each alien, looked a little guilty, on each of their two faces (forgot to mention that as well!) i asked why on Earth, or in space, did they need so many loo rolls? and they replied telepathically in unison, that they had been studying human behaviour for centuries, and had been kind of got caught up in the hysteria with the loo roll thing, and apologised profusely for abducting me, and that not to worry, that they've never done anal probing, well not on humans anyway. yet....on the plus side, they also confessed, that once a year, they all don red clothing and big white beards, and dash around on flying sleighs laughing like crazy! this they refer to as "the night of all nights!" when they consume vast quantities of alien alcohol (smells strangely like absynthe to me) and smoke curious substances. they told me they needed this 'chill out' time, after watching humans for 364 days a year! i asked why they had abducted me, and they said it was because i easn't completely human! and that on March the 10th, each year, they have an alien orgy night, and wondered if i'd like to join in and try something new? well we only live once, or so? had an interesting night, discovered that the Karma Sutra, is quite tame...😮😏💕🦄😂🦋
ps interesting full moon, especially when whizzing past it...