Get This Bitch Off

 
First I try with my left hand,
Then I try with my right,
But I can’t seem to do it,
It’s so hard and ooh so tight.
I trace my fingers around the rim,
For a little examination,
Using more strength with my palm,
It only adds to my frustration.
I’m going to use two hands on this bitch!
My digits are rigid livid on the top,
My muscles strain and my veins bulge,
But I want to hear this motherfucker pop!
My palms are red, my blood is hot,
But I’m going to find the spot,
I take a deep breath and try again
Then I give it all I got.
I become determined and driven,
Although it all may be a little bizarre,
But I finally get this bitch off,
And that’s how I take the lid off a jar.