dieing inside

sitting in the dark ,'
living all alone,
dieing a little more everyday.
i need nothing,
except that which needs me
ive destroyed the faith they had in me
i deserve nuthing
they owe me nothingif they only knew how each day that passes im jusanother small peice of me dies
im scared ofwhat my future holds
Retribution  for my
past
This is for the failure to be secure
Life has lead me here
Someday I hope I could forgive
But for now I know that amnesty from all ive done is a fools dream
Believeing in their love is my only hope
I am what I am and thank god that in spite of me they are beautifully what they a life had me in its razor grasp
And my only refuge is to escape into my mind
To a time better than now when I was clean and my lige still whple
My memories thankfully the only part of me satan cant control
I live each.day not for me but for that hope their love
For me id just give up lay down and cease to be
But for them I open my eyes I breathe another breath
To someday be back to whom im ment to be
So I only ask just for today
So alone in reality I may be
But when my eyes are closed just leave me be
Cause thats our time so in silent relemtless contemplation
I smile to my self causr they.are mine I am theirs
And god just lets me be
So forhiveness is for those with regret which I have none
So take me as I am love me this way for without your love I have no hope
Amd with jope for me the world a better reality in which to be
Im only sorry that I cant go back and just say no so if you forgive that of me
Then to retributiom ill go