Love dies a slow death, without touch...

I have knelt upon your altar, worshipping your heart & soul in pure devotion for almost a decade as you set fire to mine, in order to draw me closer to you.  
 
I waited years for you to awaken to the possibilities of merging as one, however, you seem to have settled for the one that couldn’t ever make such a deep sacrifice and that is you upholding your promise, to her.
 
After all we’ve been through, you still can’t see the wrong in all the writings that bound me to you as I struggled to give myself holistically to another as you  remained on the periphery, always beckoning me to surrender to you until you became the baseline of comparison in which no other man could ever compare, or ever live up to.  
 
I served you and your purpose for years, and in return, you enabled me to languish in an empty bed with idle hands that should’ve been threaded in yours as we slumbered whilst tangled up in one another each evening, after serving one another.
 
No woman can ever be healed; nourished and nurtured holistically, wholly and solely without the ceremonious kiss, and ritualistic touch from the man she loves, forevermore.  
 
My awakening of such truth assures me that I cannot commit another decade of my blossoming & ripened being whilst lying to myself when an ocean separates us, despite your firm grip upon my mind, body and soul.
 
I will no longer compete for your love & affection when another closer geographically asserts his devotion, and promises what you’re not capable of sharing with me.  
 
You will always have a piece of my heart and I will always love you, for you taught me the purity of love, and showed me how a gentleman should love his woman.
 
It’d be wrong of me to even utter an ultimatum when I know deep down that time is no longer on our side, and the thought of her being oblivious to the depth & longevity of our emotional binding, leaves me reeling.  
 
Life, is too short for me to not seek what you have with her; sacred vows, of until death do us part.  
 
However, I will give my whole heart to him, and not a fraction as the equation of such would never add up, and how could I ever lie with him each night, with you on my mind.
 
Betrayal, isn’t my cup of tea as my conscience wreaks havoc with my capacity to look another in the eye.
 
Eventually, you’ll heal and cherish what you have with her, and I’ll become a distant memory that’s neither here, nor there.
 
I will always love you, however, I’m tired & weary; in need of flesh & bone to hold me close to him, and wipe away my tears when I’m hurt because there’s a whole lot of hurt that needs to be released to unfuck my troubled mind.