Listen to Your Heart

https://youtu.be/yCC_b5WHLX0
 
I find myself awake all night long  
Sitting listening to my favourite song  
A screen shows me the artist just died  
Fuck... I can’t believe how hard I cried  

A song about love... beautiful but wicked  
I did what she said... but my way was twisted  
I lied... tricked... and fuck... I also stole  
And in the end it feels like I lost my soul  
 
I did it all without a thought about cost  
look at me now... and everything I’ve lost  
I hurt so many that called me friend  
Ripped myself apart, a heart... unable to mend  
 
I might as well have dug my own fucking grave  
Made myself nothing but a worthless deceitful slave  
Lying to myself convinced that  I did it all for her  
Can I remember all the details? No, it’s just a blur  
 
I’m really not the only one who lied  
And I really did it all just so I could be by her side  
We both call the other so many hurtful names  
Should know better than to play stupid games  
 
I know the answer is for me to walk away  
But fuck I really do just want to stay  
Something I know will never work out  
Like a child all I want to do is scream and shout  
 
I never thought I was being abusive  
I started by trying just to make her live  
selfish... I took advantage of so many  
Might as well have stolen every single penny  
 
In the end I told everyone the truth  
I knew all along what I would lose  
True friends... the ones who at least talk  
Give me a chance to explain... despite the shock  
 
A few of them even shared with me a drink  
And told me that into darkness... I couldn’t sink  
I’m not going to be the one to shed the blame  
I won’t even throw a shadow on her name  
 
I’ll stand alone and never look at her again  
But she cut me deep, leaving the darkest stain  
the truth... we both did things that were wrong  
And gods... I still love that fucking song  
 
That Hustla...  
Everyday I’m hustlin...