If Only

I never could have dreamt up
How misleading this world could be  
Or how knotted and twisted that life becomes  
Like some eerie and haunting old tree  
 
In my youth, often times, I would marvel  
At how strange and amazing life is  
Pondering things to which there's no answer  
Like the reason it is that we exist  
 
I've witnessed it said through the ages  
By those who've been both young and old  
"If only I could go back, do it over,  
While knowing all it is that I know."  
 
My mind becomes plagued with these words  
If only......if only, indeed......  
To have just gone left, instead of right  
With such knowledge, what might I have achieved  
 
Such things are oh-so-perplexing  
Playing at scenarios in my mind  
What if I had just made better choices  
Would it alter how my character's been defined  
 
It is possible the results would be different  
And in turn, I'd live a different life  
Or am I fated, regardless the means of travel,  
To the outcome my journey provides  
 
Would I still pay in small unmarked happiness  
Would it matter what choices I've made  
Is this what destiny's fated for me  
Never able to rise above my mistakes  
 
These thoughts, and so many others  
Are those often ruling my mind  
Their answers are so much more than evasive  
For they're answers that no one's meant to find  
 
And even if you pray it won't happen  
Especially when you don't want it to  
The sun will still shine on tomorrow  
Life will go on....  
                     ......and do so......  
                                       .....without you....