What may I call you?

Dirt beneath my skin  
Rotting but aware  
My time has not yet ended  
My skin was stripped left bare  

I am filled by ice  
Held by the wind  
I speak in low moans  
Trying to make my loved ones understand  
Death is a beautiful thing  
Corrupted by what you see  
Hear  
Smell  
Because you cannot feel  
Nor understand  
Until your bones are encrusted with dried leaves  
Your skin peels and muscles dry  
Your hair will become strings held by earth's cold core  
No emotion will warm your dreams  
You can't even dream  
Eyes closed in the casket are now wide shut bathed in tears  
 
I saw my mother today  
Skin pricked by the moonlight and she wept  
Happiness  
I guess I never knew what happiness was until I couldnt have it  
 
My breath will seep from my lungs  
My teeth crowded with dried flowers  
Too many colors to recount  
My body again black,white, and lavendar skin  
A mosaic of disease  
Crumbling back into the earth  
To disappear forever  
To meld my bones into sticks  
A tree that holds laughing children  
Laughing children  
That will someday lie beside me  
 
-Alyxes K Mcmanus