The nature of my addiction

I am right back in the middle  
Of the addiction  
Becoming fixated  
In the affliction  

Of the ritualism of desire  
Waiting for the text or call  
Longing for the time  
When together we will fall  
 
In LOVE again and all that implies  
Falling for the feelings that  
Will take away this pain inside  
And allow me to erase the past  
 
Fixation! It ravages my mind  
My brain looping with dreams  
Of you inside of me, holding me  
But nothing is at it seems  
 
You are incapable of holding my love  
Only my body will you mesmerize  
Until I am left shattered  
Pieces far and wide