Bit of a Prick

Thought about what I was today,
tried to look deep into my soul
but a prick was standing in the way;
all upbeat grins and energy
spouting references
with an all too sunny disposition
that shines blindingly bright out of that arse
-wholly blind to sorrow or depth
with far too much quirky quips.

That surely is not me, is it?

I never thought I would become
something like that,
and I suppose it is better than nothing at all,
but it is horrible to seek to dig deep
only to be able to scratch the surface of the soul:
to find a shopping mall
where once a
lonely
mysterious
mystical
desert once was.
Maybe this is all unearned pride before some fall,
or better yet,
someone to be beholden unto.