what the fuck

im so in love with confusion dillusion and pain
i return eagerly each day
to deceive myself into thinking
the outcomes will be differant
but if at the end of the numbness
im shaken by truth
then i suppose the outcome is clear
i love it want it im used to it here
if the friends ive chosen ever shocked me
in the everlasting dalerium of spuns grip
then it might force me to admit
that my lifestyle is definately lacking
in realism all of us grown roaming like children
if nobody else knows it we are time wasters and wastes of time
the day is yet again finished and accomplished
absolutely nothing
im so fucking sick of my uselessness
futile and deserted
of course all the really important shit is left at this days end undone
alot like myself