Caught in court.

The reflection of you is ever there
and I'm doing a good job
of keeping up appearances
but they're appearances
and appearances are a facade
and the facade feels calm,
collected in comparison
to the evidence.

I am the evidence.

You are the jury, the judge,
the defence and it's my word
against yours,
your words that echo in the acoustics
and your words that paint a damning picture
I can't and don't and won't deny.
A few more breaths to calm my reddened face,
a few more moments to collect my mind
yet we still need to reach a verdict.

I am the evidence.

Don't scold me with those looks
when bail seems the only justice.
Yes, I threw your heart with the shirts
and toys and photographs
but that's just me,
I never meant to hurt you -
Suffocation is a death sentence,
I only did what I did to save myself
from the obsession.

I am the evidence
and I sleep in your bed,
with your grief even though I'm carrying on
I can imagine the damage I left,
for that I'm guilty,
for that you can send me down
or karma will do it for you, darling.