I want to stay alive.

Dear Mum,
Since I knew how to say 'I love you',
I knew something was up.
My little mind back then tried to explain it, till now I still ask why.
I hid behind you
so they wouldn't call me names
but that didn’t help.
Regardless of my cell make-up,
I'm already soft and I’m trying
...but I can't.
I just want to stay alive and come home so I can fall asleep on your shoulders.

Dear Dad,
From your eyes I see disappointment
I know, I'm disappointed too.
I want to make you proud,
just hold on to me a little longer
Before medusa gets hold of your heart.
You are my shield and provider;
I would hide my pride
just so you don't give up on me.
I just want to stay alive
so I can come home and hear
you rant every night.

Dear Friends,
I want to say more than 280 characters
But I quiver at 140.
Around you I am Mona Lisa,
Smiling, not smiling.
It's only because I'm scared
The wolves might come howling and ready to rip my soul into pieces.
I just want to stay alive
so we can crack jokes and laugh.

Dear Church,
Trust me I know,
I knew before I knew me.
I'm HIS creation too,
don’t love me any less.
I'm nostalgic to my being,
made to be put away and
filled with shame.
I close my eyes in the middle of the night
saying "Father, I beg of you
please, purge me of my sins."
All I hear is "I taught you to love."
I just want to stay alive
so I say Thank You Father
for another day.

Dear You,
for you I have become an artist
restructuring and recreating a being.
Unfortunately I suck,
I can't make me any less fabulous.
I hear you calling for blood
It tackles my eardrums every second.
Putting your faggot together
To burn at the stake.
Please! Please!! Please!!!
Just hear me out,
I promise I will stay still in the dark
I will drown out my truth.
If I can't then
please grant me the courtesy
To lay my own bed.
I just want to stay alive.

- Eleazer Obeng.