Progression

it's a different type of feeling to be this young
but to constantly feel like you aren't doing enough
to always be in between living too fast
and maybe not really even growing up
is this called being an adult
i learned it's basically the same as the majority of my teen years
dreams? those are canceled
but i'll take all of these bills and keep the same fears
and these tears from old years
see, my pain doesn't age
all that darkness, you know black doesn't crack
but sometimes it just fades into a gray
kind of chilling on the side and sneaking up to arise and shock me and control me until i have to take a breather
when my body gets to shaking and i'm pretending not to be down, almost like i'm suppressing some kind of seizure
til i hide in the back
Jada, you need to calm down
you can cry silently
but only if no one's around
why are you acting this way
you've portrayed the idealistic perception of what strength should be
always taking care of others more than yourself
momma bird shields the world under broken wings
but i'm not broken
not a victim, did everything to avoid that
when all went to hell
i threw the grenade right on back
but sometimes i need a chiropractor
because the world weighs too much
and sometimes i get in these moods
when i can't give a fuck
but you need those cold days
to really appreciate the hot ones
and sometimes i gotta act heartless
to remember i got one
i'm only human
constantly evolving and growing
gotta remember i'm always making progress
even when it's not showing