Confession of a Sociopath

You tell me things I don’t want to know.
I don’t want to know because I don’t want to be tempted.
Tempted to use it to my advantage,
Tempted to revert back to a time where people’s emotions were a game I played so fucking well.

I time where I said just enough,
At just the right moment,
To destroy lives.
While comforting my own.

Your existence sings at the person I really am.
The person who fucked a married man,
While his wife,
Cooked us dinner in the next room.

The person who fucked his wife.
While he was upstairs,
Bathing away his sins.
Guilt swirling down the drain.

The worst part is,
I never once felt guilty.
Not even,
When they left each other for me.

Not even,
When I was on a plane,
Leaving them both behind to deal with their crumbling family.
Oh yes, they had kids. I was their nanny.

You don’t want this,
I can see the fantasies swirling around your curious eyes.
But everything about me,
Is delicately tailored to lure you in.

You might be looking for a decent fuck,
And a laugh.
But that is not what’s going to happen.
It will start out subtle,

I’ll make dick jokes,
And tease that I’ve had more pussy than you,
Cuz I have.
I’ll help change your spark plugs with a full contour.
Your friends will love me,
Because I am the ultimate wingman

I’ll check out girls with you,
Play sports with you,
Drink beer,
Down a burger with a side of fries.

I’ll get so close,
You can smell the warm vanilla on my skin,
Then walk away,
Without a touch.

I’m edgy, but sweet
Loud, but funny
Sexy, but classy
Your best friend, but unobtainable.

And all of this will be real.
If there is one thing I can tell you about a sociopath,
It’s that we are honest,
Brutally.

I know which parts of my personality to showcase for each victim.
The playboy loves that I don’t feel jealousy,
Just like the poet loves my way with words.
Cruel isn’t it?

You think it’s cute that I “let things slip”,
I let you believe that.
“I love you” didn’t “slip”,
It was carefully timed.

So was the quick exit.
I planted the seed,
And left to watch how it plays out.
From a distance of course.

You’ll feel it too.
You’ll feel the warmth of love drip down and cool the lust.
You fantasies will change,
From carnal power thrusting on the back of a Camaro to cuddling in bed with our fingers lacing in and out of one another’s.

You’ll fight it,
Especially since I have been avoiding you,
Avoiding eye contact.
Pretending you’re not there.

But eventually,
You will give in.
And I will get what I want.

Because for me,
This WAS “a decent fuck and a laugh”
I’m telling you this because,
I know it won’t matter anyway.

You’ll still play into my game.
But I am hoping,
Just once,
It won’t work.