deepundergroundpoetry.com
Loss
Humming birds flitter
desolate garden spaces
hovering
hungry
barren, dull places
Grand orchestra assembled
vacant music hall
inspiration
unheard
muted chords fall
Evening stars dimmed
forming dark cloud
fading
smothered
not shimmering proud
Mournful child cries
tragic maternal death
grieving
struggling
never catching breath
desolate garden spaces
hovering
hungry
barren, dull places
Grand orchestra assembled
vacant music hall
inspiration
unheard
muted chords fall
Evening stars dimmed
forming dark cloud
fading
smothered
not shimmering proud
Mournful child cries
tragic maternal death
grieving
struggling
never catching breath
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likes 8
reading list entries 1
comments 15
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 12:29pm
Re: Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 12:53pm
Thanks for the read and taking the time to comment. Much appreciated dear friend.
Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 12:38pm
Re: Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 12:55pm
I find when suffering loss, much that is beautiful is dulled. Thanks for your response lovely.
Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 2:39pm
dearest Mel so much sorrow in this beautifully crafted poem
I could feel the progression and build up grief within it..
beautiful..
love Crim
I could feel the progression and build up grief within it..
beautiful..
love Crim
0
Re: Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 3:55pm
Thank you lovely Crim. I wasn't sure how well the sorrow would come across.
Bless
Bless
Re: Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 3:57pm
Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 4:15pm
Re: Re. Loss
9th Jun 2018 5:23pm
Re. Loss
26th Jun 2018 00:34am
I just love the subtlety in this poignant poem Mel...noting overstated...excellent.
Cheers...Harry
Cheers...Harry
0
Re: Re. Loss
2nd Jul 2018 10:16pm
Re. Loss
15th Jul 2018 2:40am
oh boy! this was an awesome write, I read it out loud about 5 times. By the forth time it had me crying, especially the last stanza :-)))
top drawer stuff :-)))))))))))))
top drawer stuff :-)))))))))))))
0
Re: Re. Loss
16th Jul 2018 8:27pm
I am honoured by RL David. Thank you! Sorry it brought tears but hope they were healing:) xx
Mel
Mel
Anonymous
- Edited 9th Apr 2022 5:45am
23rd Jun 2019 3:50pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. Loss
24th Jun 2019 10:55am