The Albatross

Stumbled blindly through my 30’s but I always end up numb  
It seems I fell asleep and then woke up 41
I offer you a seat but now it’s really close we lay
As you speak I’m tripping slowly over everything you say
I bite my tongue until it bleeds, here’s my shoulder for your tears
I’ve gathered up all your needs, here’s a closet for your fears  
I’m following an albatross and the water is so clean  
But I fell lost inside her waves so I will come back now as steam
I’ll take these sea ridden legs right onto solid ground  
And search this whole damn island till I find a simpler sound
 
I can’t be certain but I’m pretty sure I sat engulfed in frozen fear
And I can’t for the life of me recall the drive from there to here  
I took the path that was laid out for me by the stars  
And came away from this with no visible scars
You asked me for a hand but my handshake you refused  
I can see now it was your superego that was bruised
I never could resist when you asked, “Stay with me tonight?”
For I don’t want to be alone, I’m much too haunted by the light
The days never get shorter and the nights they last forever  
Putting everything off until the next side of never
 
I must have been mistaken, you were just here but now you’re gone
As I lay awake, still, as the day cracks into dawn
Have you ever heard silence? It sounds just like your own voice
I choose not to remember (as if I had a choice)
I picked up all my things and then myself off the floor
Heading out to walk astray, and perhaps I’ll find the cure
There’s been no one to check in with for a few years as it seems
But it don’t matter to me much, I never sleep…but only dream