deepundergroundpoetry.com
fin.
as the water rose
you took off your clothes
frozen from your head to your toes
you were over exposed
you crawled to bed
to rest your head
while the devil was up to bat
you forgot where you were at
it was a slow decay
and you were paying your debt
you were fading away
in a cold, cold sweat
you got deja vu
as your bones trembled
and you resembled
heroes before you
the skies turned red
doomsday had come
on a messy deathbed
you'd finally succumb
your lips turned blue
as you broke on through
to the other side
you took off your clothes
frozen from your head to your toes
you were over exposed
you crawled to bed
to rest your head
while the devil was up to bat
you forgot where you were at
it was a slow decay
and you were paying your debt
you were fading away
in a cold, cold sweat
you got deja vu
as your bones trembled
and you resembled
heroes before you
the skies turned red
doomsday had come
on a messy deathbed
you'd finally succumb
your lips turned blue
as you broke on through
to the other side
Published 28th Apr 2018
Author's Note
Mmmm... drugs!
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 3
reading list entries 0
comments 8
reads 634
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
1st May 2018 3:24am
Sure don't sound mmm. Now:
Head in a whirl
Cast out mind adrift
Floating high feeling free
See no blue lips or sky all funk in color...Well now you started it and as you can see no good on spot lol. Loved the stroke of inspiration I found in your write, Respectfully,
me(🚬🌪️)(⚰️👻)lol
Head in a whirl
Cast out mind adrift
Floating high feeling free
See no blue lips or sky all funk in color...Well now you started it and as you can see no good on spot lol. Loved the stroke of inspiration I found in your write, Respectfully,
me(🚬🌪️)(⚰️👻)lol
Thanks, I'm glad you got inspiration!
This one is more about heroin addiction. The bad side of drugs. The bad drugs. The slow death a lot of people succumb to.
I threw a Jim Morrison reference in there at the very end and beginning. That's where the bathtub scene originated and the misconstrued lyric came in. Though, I have crawled from my tub naked to bed, he just died in the tub.
They say it was drug induced illness causing congestive heart failure, while using heroin and cocaine it just killed him. Also, where the heroes before you line came from. All of those music gods who died so young from heroin addiction one way or another and so many upcoming musicians and just people in general who idolize those people and get addicted to it.
Most of my heroes are dead, if that's the proper term for them. Hero, that is.
Your spot poem is great! :P
This one is more about heroin addiction. The bad side of drugs. The bad drugs. The slow death a lot of people succumb to.
I threw a Jim Morrison reference in there at the very end and beginning. That's where the bathtub scene originated and the misconstrued lyric came in. Though, I have crawled from my tub naked to bed, he just died in the tub.
They say it was drug induced illness causing congestive heart failure, while using heroin and cocaine it just killed him. Also, where the heroes before you line came from. All of those music gods who died so young from heroin addiction one way or another and so many upcoming musicians and just people in general who idolize those people and get addicted to it.
Most of my heroes are dead, if that's the proper term for them. Hero, that is.
Your spot poem is great! :P
Just a quick jot, it's really bothering me.
I meant no disrespect nor making light of a very damaging and destructive epidemic affecting so many. Sometimes a strange giddiness occurs and comes out in my writing, comments or simple conversation, it can be thought quite rude or insensitive, I assure you it is not. My sister and several past friends have either died or been heavily affected by addiction. Writings such as this can and does bring desperately needed awareness, great change and encouragement in the darkest of day's. That demands respect and with my deepest of respect i give it. My sorriest of sorrys if found offensive in any way. My upmost respect,
Survivor
I meant no disrespect nor making light of a very damaging and destructive epidemic affecting so many. Sometimes a strange giddiness occurs and comes out in my writing, comments or simple conversation, it can be thought quite rude or insensitive, I assure you it is not. My sister and several past friends have either died or been heavily affected by addiction. Writings such as this can and does bring desperately needed awareness, great change and encouragement in the darkest of day's. That demands respect and with my deepest of respect i give it. My sorriest of sorrys if found offensive in any way. My upmost respect,
Survivor
I get mistakenly seen as pretty rude and offensive sometimes, too! I'm not easily offended. 😜
I didn't see your comment as rude at all, I just appreciated the comment! I'm sorry to hear about some of that, though. I just figured I'd explain what it was all about, it wasn't because I was upset.
You're right, the world does need more awareness in all sections and crevices of the place. Although, this is a stupidly depressing poem, it's what was on my mind. I need more awareness, also. Sometimes I forget how bad things can really be when they aren't that bad and this was my way of remembering, warning and convincing.
I didn't see your comment as rude at all, I just appreciated the comment! I'm sorry to hear about some of that, though. I just figured I'd explain what it was all about, it wasn't because I was upset.
You're right, the world does need more awareness in all sections and crevices of the place. Although, this is a stupidly depressing poem, it's what was on my mind. I need more awareness, also. Sometimes I forget how bad things can really be when they aren't that bad and this was my way of remembering, warning and convincing.
7th May 2018 2:04am
Badn, it damn near is impossible to insult me
as well, I'm just way too much of a curious sort. Never underestimate the power or impact, even a mindless jot, which this is not, can send and does have, no matter the genre. To me, this is a deeply personal page of any and every thing goes to look back upon, to reflect, to see if ease has been found. Never ever settle when one's worth, this time your mood or feelings, is involved. Much love and mad respect,
Survivor
as well, I'm just way too much of a curious sort. Never underestimate the power or impact, even a mindless jot, which this is not, can send and does have, no matter the genre. To me, this is a deeply personal page of any and every thing goes to look back upon, to reflect, to see if ease has been found. Never ever settle when one's worth, this time your mood or feelings, is involved. Much love and mad respect,
Survivor
Love the description and point you make here too...its an awesome poem...your love for music shows because your poems are simple, short, like lyrics and have a musical tone to them
27th Feb 2019 4:41am
27th Feb 2019 4:43am
