A letter to dad.

 
Your falling like rain pouring from the sky, pulling the pain thats hidden in my eyes.
The devel comes knocking but the life I live thats no surprise  
Try to stay straghit with my head held high but i'm drowning in your lies.
The alcahol is pointless cuse it only leads to my dimise, my knees as weak as my trubbled mind.
Dark skies black couds then the lights go out.
Nightmires no dreams or an ounce of light  
Take shots hope I forget but even with blurry vision I have regrets.
Kida ironic the doc told me pain killers cure the stress, but is this the best?
So I start to question whether im like you and all the rest.
On the outside class clown, but if you look deep down to the depths.  
My heart and body ache no self respect.
All around me is noise but I cant hear it,
The silence is so vivid I can almost taste it.
Trying to invision you standing in front of me, the father that you autta be.
But still your invisable as far as my eyes and arms can reach.
My body feels numb but still I know through my vens pumps your blood
Never understood all the pain groing up, now I look in the mirror happiness would be strange.
Am I diranged to think that everything will be ok?  
Can i forget all the demonds that come out to play?
Hell no thats what makes me who i am today.
Then i realize ill be fine...
But will you be alright?