Depression

I am the river covered with ice...i am the sun covered by the moon...i am the road covered in fog...i am the voice drowned out by sound...i suffer in silence...so what becomes of me now?

Seems all i ever do is cry...sitting on this bed...waiting to die...and all the stars fall at my feet...and all the people wanna meet me...just because of beauty...who cares what i think...

Theres a such thing..as being too beautiful...and theres a such thing...as being too smart....but i am tortured by the two because i'm doomed with a big heart...i care too much...so i'm damned to never fall in love...to be everyones crutch

Men just make me black and blue...my parents too...so i reach for help but theres no one there...nobody loves me...no one ever did...i remember when i was a kid...bullies were in thier prime...they hated my long hair and pretty eyes..

School was an easy "A" for me...but i never had a friend to praise me...except for the voices in my head...the shadow in my closet...the black quiet....spirit activity...talks with the dead...giving them understanding...never feared what they said...but even the bad ones came to see me...they respected me...my soul was too holy...

Up at the window i sit and glare as people walk by and stare...at my lonely house in the town of no where...i go for walks in the graveyard...with a pocket of tarot cards...and i say hello to all thats there...and i let the wind breeze through my hair

Touching a stone...i can see thier past...thier face...thier grin...thier laugh...i can feel the pain of death...crippling pain...yet i want it so bad...cause life is too hard...when it doesn't have to be

Nobody loves me..nobody loves me...nobody loves me...nobody loves me...nobody loves me...nobody knows me...and they don't care to...I'm only good enough for sex...just a prize to collect...just a spec on dust...blowing in the wind...floating through space...just another face

Time has been good to me...i must admit...i still have this beauty..that won't go away..i still have my groupies...stalkers...followers and strays...i am still outspoken...outsmarting everybody...but no one likes a know it all...a show off...better to leave them in the dark...but they can see because i ask them to see!

Oh but who am i...and i can't bring them to life...i can't blend in with them...not with the humans...i am like an angel who got left behind...i can't keep the man i love...he's from this earth...he doesn't know what i'm worth or what he deserves...i can see his future when i touch his face...it doesn't include me...but its okay

I'll keep going...I know the way...I will always have..these memories...maybe its good enough...cause i am damned to never find love...sanity escapes me...constantly my mind is thinking...I will never sleep...i know where you go when you sleep...i know what are dreams...and what they really mean...i'm too smart for love and i'm too smart for that.