deepundergroundpoetry.com
Relapse (TRIGGER WARNING)
Rocking back and forth,
Losing my mind,
This pain is overtaking,
The demons will win,
I crawl across the floor to my backpack,
And frantically I search for where I keep my sanity,
They’ve been here when no one else was,
Now they’re here just waiting for me, slowly calling,
I cross my legs and lean at the foot of my bed,
Another tear escapes my eye as I open the pouch where they’re kept,
And I’m breathing heavily wishing I wasn’t here,
But now I’m painting the same old picture,
My wrists make a beautiful canvas and this blade is a twisted brush,
Running the silver across my skin and watching the blood run down to my hands,
Can’t believe I’m here again, yet once again,
So I was right, the demons won,
I see beauty and you see broken,
Now "one" "two" "three”,
I whisper to myself before I lacerate my skin,
Why?
Love, hope, light,
They don’t exist anymore,
Taking a deep breath I feel serene after all,
I know I’m a mess,
Relapsing in this state,
I'm okay now though,
Closing my eyes once calm again I drift away to sleep,
I guess a relapse was all I needed.
Losing my mind,
This pain is overtaking,
The demons will win,
I crawl across the floor to my backpack,
And frantically I search for where I keep my sanity,
They’ve been here when no one else was,
Now they’re here just waiting for me, slowly calling,
I cross my legs and lean at the foot of my bed,
Another tear escapes my eye as I open the pouch where they’re kept,
And I’m breathing heavily wishing I wasn’t here,
But now I’m painting the same old picture,
My wrists make a beautiful canvas and this blade is a twisted brush,
Running the silver across my skin and watching the blood run down to my hands,
Can’t believe I’m here again, yet once again,
So I was right, the demons won,
I see beauty and you see broken,
Now "one" "two" "three”,
I whisper to myself before I lacerate my skin,
Why?
Love, hope, light,
They don’t exist anymore,
Taking a deep breath I feel serene after all,
I know I’m a mess,
Relapsing in this state,
I'm okay now though,
Closing my eyes once calm again I drift away to sleep,
I guess a relapse was all I needed.
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