deepundergroundpoetry.com
D.R.own me
Imagine me naked, as you often do
Pin me down with the soles of your polished shoes
At the bottom of the tank I lay face down and compliant
Your Blackberry beeps - It's an important client
Pace my back as you would the floor
Scuff my flesh and make it sore
Pack your case and lay it on my thighs
Remember! to forget me, you must avert your eyes
Have a drink, that'll make you blind
Open the bottle and pour it over my behind
Place your scanner and printer across my shoulder blades
Use both your laptops to hold down my waist
A cider, a cocktail, a glass of champagne
Splash over my skin as they course through your veins
Pile your D.R. books up over my head
Use mile stones and targets to cover my legs
Only my arms are showing now, my fingers, my touch
Don't stop to remember - it hurts you too much
Folders, and binders, and new A4 pads
will cover them swiftly, now, out with the lads!
Drink after drink the tank's filling up quickly
The smell in my tomb is both welcome and sickly
I'm immersed now, covered, I accept my fate
I smile and close my eyes as the bubbles escape
I envisage a mermaid, you've freed me, I think
Never again will I be at your brink
Wanting, Hurting, missing you, sad
You imagine I'd thank you...
you'd be right.
I'd be glad.
Pin me down with the soles of your polished shoes
At the bottom of the tank I lay face down and compliant
Your Blackberry beeps - It's an important client
Pace my back as you would the floor
Scuff my flesh and make it sore
Pack your case and lay it on my thighs
Remember! to forget me, you must avert your eyes
Have a drink, that'll make you blind
Open the bottle and pour it over my behind
Place your scanner and printer across my shoulder blades
Use both your laptops to hold down my waist
A cider, a cocktail, a glass of champagne
Splash over my skin as they course through your veins
Pile your D.R. books up over my head
Use mile stones and targets to cover my legs
Only my arms are showing now, my fingers, my touch
Don't stop to remember - it hurts you too much
Folders, and binders, and new A4 pads
will cover them swiftly, now, out with the lads!
Drink after drink the tank's filling up quickly
The smell in my tomb is both welcome and sickly
I'm immersed now, covered, I accept my fate
I smile and close my eyes as the bubbles escape
I envisage a mermaid, you've freed me, I think
Never again will I be at your brink
Wanting, Hurting, missing you, sad
You imagine I'd thank you...
you'd be right.
I'd be glad.
Published 10th Sep 2011
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Anonymous
12th Sep 2011 3:01am
wow this is an awaesome poem
13th Sep 2011 12:51pm
13th Sep 2011 6:59pm
I'm sitting here in awe, not sure how to comment. As I am hoping this was a work of the imagination and not a true story of a husband of boyfriend who would treat a woman with such terrible disrespect for so long that she comes to expect and desire it. Every line of this is gripping and the imagery is visually haunting.
If it is born in the imagination, I coulld say what a great and powerful piece this is. But if real, I don't have words, it hurts to go there, my brain can't wrap around the concept and wants to reject it. Something so painful shouldn't be so good. And the title really caught my eye. D.R. could be his initials, or he is a doctor, interwoven with the concept of being drowned by him metaphorically.
If it is born in the imagination, I coulld say what a great and powerful piece this is. But if real, I don't have words, it hurts to go there, my brain can't wrap around the concept and wants to reject it. Something so painful shouldn't be so good. And the title really caught my eye. D.R. could be his initials, or he is a doctor, interwoven with the concept of being drowned by him metaphorically.
14th Sep 2011 1:32am
Wow, I'm a little overwhelmed by that response, thank you firstly, that comment is a massive complement!
Let me try to explain, it isn't easy and I bet i can't fully! The guy this is about is actually the gentlest, most loving man I have ever met, the love of my life in fact (believe it or not, lol) but, due to circumstances beyond our control (nothing sinister, it's very admirable actually) we can no longer be together, this has devastated us both, there was nobody more in love with or amazed by each other, than we were (are). It's only been two months but each day has felt like a week. He has buried himself massively in his work and hidden his feelings in drinking a little more often. He loves me but he is not expressing it, it hurts him too much. I spent days in bed, inconsolable, he has a really intense job (in Disaster Recovery -D.R.) and to let himself feel the full impact of our split could cost him his job (it did me). well, as the weeks have gone by, his denial of his feelings has felt like a denial of me, of our whole relationship and it cut me to the core. So it is metaphorical you're right, exaggerated, a characatuer of his behaviour. the impact it has had on me is very real, the hurt is from missing him, missing his affection, the feelings of giving up and accepting come from accepting it is over, plus the frustration of trying to elicit a loving response or a reminiscent remark and hitting a brick wall every time. his lack of feeling in the poem is meant to represent his denial. I hope this makes sense!
Thanks again for such a full and flattering response :)
Let me try to explain, it isn't easy and I bet i can't fully! The guy this is about is actually the gentlest, most loving man I have ever met, the love of my life in fact (believe it or not, lol) but, due to circumstances beyond our control (nothing sinister, it's very admirable actually) we can no longer be together, this has devastated us both, there was nobody more in love with or amazed by each other, than we were (are). It's only been two months but each day has felt like a week. He has buried himself massively in his work and hidden his feelings in drinking a little more often. He loves me but he is not expressing it, it hurts him too much. I spent days in bed, inconsolable, he has a really intense job (in Disaster Recovery -D.R.) and to let himself feel the full impact of our split could cost him his job (it did me). well, as the weeks have gone by, his denial of his feelings has felt like a denial of me, of our whole relationship and it cut me to the core. So it is metaphorical you're right, exaggerated, a characatuer of his behaviour. the impact it has had on me is very real, the hurt is from missing him, missing his affection, the feelings of giving up and accepting come from accepting it is over, plus the frustration of trying to elicit a loving response or a reminiscent remark and hitting a brick wall every time. his lack of feeling in the poem is meant to represent his denial. I hope this makes sense!
Thanks again for such a full and flattering response :)
Anonymous
14th Sep 2011 6:50pm
excellent poem
demonstrates ability to write good poems in creative ways to bring attention to an issue that is often found....both elegant and subtle
demonstrates ability to write good poems in creative ways to bring attention to an issue that is often found....both elegant and subtle
14th Sep 2011 7:03pm
Thank you somelikeithot, that is a very generous comment and I am flattered to say the least! :)
Sue
Sue
