deepundergroundpoetry.com
EIDOLON
I. P R O L O G U E
‘I awaken... in torpor
In silence begets the morn
Still weathered from last eve
Where crumble still my reveries
And all the faces turn from me
As my amnesty aligns
With perdition
Grief struck its nails inside
And from the black
A mute chord, ever pure
And white...’
She glances upward to the glass, and sordid did this flower seem
Two petals in thought, swimming past
Gems of rain, feeding gravity
And whispering nothing I, but whispered something
'Leave me never', she said with a smile
'Leave you ever, never I would do
The thought of such to me, so vile'
As thought became the ill so true
As if the truth became a riddle, I never strayed far from the middle
As top-bound left a scar of doubt, and bottom in undying drought
So sip I did on greenest tea, and sordid would I ever be
With death beneath me, seething grey
As life was just a dream away
Alas, such a gruesome truth
Epitome of timeless youth
While your tender light eludes, so must the darkness pursue
Oh, yours those bends on beauty glide, in which my listless eyes reside
That silhouette I do adore, uncharted realms yet to explore
Oh, how I adore...
Most serene decor, of yours
And fragrant and clean
No famine to spoil the scene
The sickness of a strength demeaned, to which it is the one vaccine
As a kingdom craves a king, became the kingdom's only queen
And to what degree?
Silk upon the pearly sea?
Such cuisine to be
A cracking door, a silver key
I am without a paddle, in the flood
Strange this afternoon, to be loved
A dazzling brightness, somber light
To thin the veils of foggy night
Tempest in my ears, some fictitious memory so dear
And I was thinking...
Of how the rain had never shifted, of how my frown she'd always lifted
Stuck inside that joyous reverie, of how her features reached the door
And turned 'round, movements pure, to grasp my eyes once more...
Hands like snow on sheltered glades, throat like laughing masquerades
Enigmatic eyes, mystic glaze
Like gaseous colours in space
Above hazel skies, with violet trace...
We were walking this day together
On crumbling roads, leaf-clothed
Waltzing dreams of many nights
And leather trees with stagnant boughs
Shutting in the radiant light
Scarce flickers like a screen somehow
If only a dream could avail reality, that rusty nail
Embedded forever within me still, and smeared upon the windowsill
And then it came without a word
And acute, my screams, but never heard...
In distorted lustre, bound to me
To this day, a raven among the bend
Betrayed by life, a crimson street
If even a wish could ever mend
In graced breath, her whispers bled
The one who had me now lies dead...
II. P E R I P E T I E
All the matter of the world
Tangible, visible
Some self-sufficient, some dependent
Spun around amidst the dream, ripping of the golden seam
It was the easiest and worst way
All the matter, yesterday
Structured illusion; fractal, pure
Angels itching at a chance to vilify their dying dance
Daemons sigh under the sky, of tightening ropes to pry
As if wearing a crown of thorns embedded
Inside the horns
Clay pendulum, razor twine
Mnemonic tool, deranged inside
A forceful leap into the dark, where insects dug into the bark
I must sweep the past aside, I must see the future glide
Become the scythe to end it all
Redemption, in pestilence crawl
It was never true until proven, no one guilty of the crime
Until I found the names of those who played
This sinister game
So leap I did into the night, and reap I did tonight of nights
Tracked down to Death's delight
Greased the wheel of terror's carriage, insidious revenge exacted
Nothing more their paws could damage
No dawn, no day
Sun glaze fading away
Live on, no way
Come and strip away the means of all
The subtleties, the memories
That I am too strong to remember, too weak to forget
Fading slowly, like a cosmic entity dripping down the skyline
Recalled, glistening by, absinthe to the virgin tongue
An eye that cannot witness, a scar forever young
Pale coating, whisper itches
Dawn...
Dawn has finally gone
Feather in the breeze, particle hidden, immersing ocean wave
Dawn, to forget me
And in spite of this severity, I doubt that you'd remember me
It has been so very long
Ashes remain where we had lain
I'm sorry...
Ylem...
Broken urgency...
Bitter breathing...
Death become free...
Cleansing...
Spilled into the matter that matters most...
III. A P O G E E
Aberration, shallow stirring
Expergefaction of the senses
Guiding candle melts away, gives way for oblivion
Solstice sparks, celibate star
Ignis fatuus, blight insidious
Clouds are coming clean
Dreaming sky, silver lining
Stratus looming nigh
River grey, fog descending
The fruits of cowardice shutting away the mist
Twilight seeping forth
Dusty trails, closing doors
Nights empty with Autumn proud shill winds turning around
Dusk burning across the sun
Leaves wilting, paths undone
An escapade, frost ridden street
Delving deeper into the throes
Begrimed, in walking sleep
Rupturing in tortured pose
One, of which names forgotten
Sordid reaping, the swarm begotten
As rotting oak on roads untrodden
Bestial desires undulating
Unraveling
This place of old and dear
Now stricken with abnormal fear
Even embrace left no ease
One with here, remove the crease
Came clairvoyance, with thought was clear
Like a meddlesome tapping within my ear
Three months from a year
It was today, these shapes sought to belay
Two vultures and a swan
Some subtly ill memory gone
It stabs inside an ache so long
It was today, all reasons wrong
‘All the stab wounds left to mend
All that was, shall be again'
Forsworn until a finished task, dripping of an empty flask
Reeling from what came to pass
Anxiety, it came at last
As if touching the aether, there I was
Disposed of self, a synapse away
Hearkening, oscillating between zenith and nadir
Beholding the wraith whom I knew
Eidolon...
Something was wrong, however
Never sullen before, now if ever
Realized this mistake so violent
The howling never seemed so silent
There, inside this sepulcher
Gazing with a face obscure
The devils that I laid to rest
Made their scar into her chest
Lest I may be witness;
'See, how being dead is bliss'
Horror struck me like a knife, same terror that was so defined
When at first I found the carrion, flesh was crawling
Could not behold for longer, as if tears became ichor
And I ran...
Never looked behind, legs outran my mind
Breath was shuddering, but still I carried forward
Life had never seemed so frail, felt as though Death would avail
I couldn't sleep with both eyes closed that night
Hours progressed sluggishly
The rain inside my heart was flooding me
Thought she smiled when I turned away...
IV. D E N O U E M E N T
I carried through the next day
Insomniac in melancholy
Toiled 'till the ropes in my hands
Hung loosely over cracking bones
Drew my last cigarette
Charring my lungs as I'd always done
Startled by a gentle gust
I couldn't bear that ghostly touch!
Arrival...
Home felt strangely safe
Soaked hair laid on the bed
Freed my last thoughts of the night
Shut eyes, spiraling down
Dreams became nightmares
Still running, remembering
Felt no trace of heartbeat, gasping for consciousness
When at last I found it, I screamed!
That face was staring down on me...
I saw that face, knowing nothing of Heaven
Like the darkest room, beyond the sun's reach
Across a distance such as, between us, obtained no measure
Like obscurity, aegis forming smoke
As her eyes, ever cloudy and dead...
Drowned in torpor, lucid eyes adrift to shore
Trying not to look back, into that lifelessness black
'Monochrome, river foam, bleeding home
Last droplet upon the loam
Losing heat, scent of wheat, covered feet
Dancing to archaic beat
Sweating glass, tongue of brass, our impasse
Cataleptic, frost-laden grass’
‘You were not the first
Those notions reversed
And when the forest calls me
These ashes I am bound to disperse
And when the shadows haunt me
I will be the one to drive the hearse’
‘Whiskey flask, tundra Pasque, fading mask
In the dying sun, basked
Maple pier, silver sphere, singing clear
Falling from the spire here
Some debris, flowing free, ebony
Now the heart will never see’
‘You were not the first
Those notions reversed
And when the forest calls me
These ashes I am bound to disperse
And when the shadows haunt me
I will be the one to drive the hearse'
V. E P I L O G U E
It was I...
Standing in the aftermath
What was stolen, taken back
After wolves, the fox returned
A sentence long deserved
The void inside will never be filled
Just a drop of that precious, sickening beauty
In too deep, I saw the signs
Yet the freedom was killed, and temptation was the way
The path I'd walked so blissfully still
In the Winter of my lifeless breath
Cold and frigid, yet ever so full
I'd never missed that crimson liquor, as a stump missing it's trunk
Decadent and whimsical
Alas, mine is the joker's card, the fool who fell in love
Never more to pass the blame
I wore the headdress, filled with shame
Guilt bore fruit inside of me, wild flower, plucked for thee
Chauffeur I was for Death, you see
Mocking laughter always tore
‘More and more’, the void implored
Years with that beloved whore
Running through my dreams at night
Scenes of her dying breath, feel that blistering caress
Lips formed a perfect circle
‘Forever and again my love, I will be there’
A sentence as I heard it well
Eidolon, watched me as I fell
A strand of something marks my floor
My tether broke, a settled score
Indeed, sentenced I was
To die... no more...
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