Those Days

on those days  
nothing exists  
outside the pitiful prison  
I call my room  
 
it doesn't matter what plans are in store  
or who comes knocking at the bolted door  
I can't hear you through the locks and chains--

I am unreachable on those days  
 
on those days  
time is an illusion  
playing with my throbbing mind  
 
on those days  
I'm filled with fatigue and drained of life
of feeling
of everything  
 
I am useless and pathetic on those days  
 
I'm don't know the cause
or why I'm okay one day  
and miserable the next
unable to face reality
or exit this cage
I've built for myself
 
sweating, shaking, stomach growling  
I pinch myself to keep from drowning  
my music is my ringing ears  
as I wait for the energy I need to break free--
but it never comes
 
all I can do is try to make it through  
and hope tomorrow won't be  
one of those days