Layers

There comes a time when you can no longer bite your tongue
Between people…and life all I have left is that man in the mirror telling me to stay calm and chill the fuck out.
But that’s a lot easier said then done
I searched for peace and could not find it
I thought that by stepping back and allowing life to take the wheel…my life would not be as fucked up as it is
Or maybe I am meant to ensure that it remains that way
If I were to sit here and give you more energy than what I have already given you
Then I may as well bend down and kiss both your feet and ass as well.
Yet although I realize it would give you much pleasure to watch me do just that
I am here to tell you that it will never happen
You see behind my eye lies a nerve that has been bugging the hell out of me
And every year that passes it becomes more and more irritable
Hence the reason why it is called a pinched nerve
You stepped to me as if I were a child…your child that needed to be disciplined
Yet all I was doing was trying to remain in my own lane…
In case you have not realized it
I built my foundation off of my hurt and my pain
Experiences after experiences have been placed into these words, so that way if I were to stop writing they will forever continue to tell their stories.
The stories would never be forgotten and my name will forever be encrypted into engraved words itched into the subconscious of anyone who reads and take away whatever it is that they choose to take away from what I have written.
But until that time comes, I will continue to break down walls, I will continue to evolve, and become better.
And by becoming better maybe I will do better
Maybe I will find more reasons to stand my ground and not allow the ignorance of the world to tare me down.
Life will not be such an uphill battle but rather a war that I know that I am going to win.
Maybe the lies that are spread out upon the ground that I walk will remain bound to the earth…never to be granted the chance to reach the ears and tongues of the innocent.
Maybe at some point all lives will matter and that false sense of security will actually be security and my brothers and sisters of all different colors and origins will finally not have to worry about being treated like they are nothing
When really we all live, breed, and die just the same.
Because the last time I checked my eyes have never once seen a more superior being.
I speak these words as they break off of my heavy thoughts
Slump down into my seat as I brace myself for whats to come
I have been silent for too long
Lost in my own doubtful thoughts
Drowning in my own misery
At least this is what I thought…
The pain will never stop, the words will continue
My eyes are open, my fingers are prepped…one chapter has been closed
A new one is now open.