Gained a Little Weight

  "Since you've gotten so big", "Well it's because you've gained weight", "I'll take the clothes you can't fit into anymore", "You used to look good", "No offense".

  I'm so sick of hearing this. Yeah, I may have gained a little weight. Or a lot, I don't know. But, I'm happy. Can't you see that?
  Apparently not. You can only see the rolls that have sprouted under my bra strap. The rolls when I sit down. The thigh gap that is no longer.
  You don't see that every inch of rolls were planted with care and tenderness. And that gap, that gap was filled with love and happiness.
  I am stitched together with a tiny thread, holding on only because I have someone to tie me back together when I start to fall back apart. Because I have someone who truly love me.
  See before, you know, when I "looked good", I didn't feel good. I didn't loose weight to look good. I lost weight because I was so depressed. Eating was just a lost cause; running, the only way I tried to escape, just to fail.
  I was so mentally mind fucked by someone who knew what he was doing but didn't give a damn. I was so mad at myself, the world. How could you not notice how alone I was?
  But what did you notice? How I "looked good" because I didn't have a single roll. And how you could see the world through the inside of my thighs. Everyone left, I was so alone; I felt like my life didn't matter to anyone.
  But then, he came along. And he fixed me, like broken glass; so fragile and weak. He makes me feel like I'm his world.
  And now I'm crying. Out of happiness.. anger.. I'm so happy that I have found someone, or maybe he found me. But either way, he is someone who sees that I've gained a little weight, but knows it was put there to ground me back to life. And yet, I'm so angry, that no one, not a single damn person saw what was happening to me. And still can't.
  Why can't you see me? I'm right here, all in my 170 pounds of "used to look good". You can't miss me, remember? So why don't you see how happy I am now? How taken care of I am now? How worthy I finally am and feel to one single human being on this Earth? Why couldn't you see that I was falling apart when I was 110 pounds of nothing, floating slowly away? How could you not see just how truly miserable I was?
  But, that's the thing with this life. We only see what we see. And some will never see the true meaning behind the skin so "perfectly" molded around my bones, slowing disappearing. And some will never, ever see why the beautiful rolls were planted so perfectly on me, blooming everyday out of pure joy.
  So yeah, maybe I've gained a little weight. Or a lot, I don't know because I'm finally happy.